I Want it All
by Cofkett
Summary: "I am a cop; I do not have time to get emotional every time someone leaves. That is the job; people leave all the time. We were lucky to all have each other as long as we did." 2013 Ficathon entry. Warning: Spoilers in reviews. Note: Main genre is crime. Cover art by dtrekker. Now slightly AU. Rated T until chapter 21.
1. Two Grown-Ass Men

**Disclaimer: I do not own _Castle_. No money will be sought for this work.**

**Word Count: 1,320**

* * *

Castle knelt before her. Beckett stared back, mouth agape. When she finally managed to conjure words, her phone rang.

"Uh -"

"Answer it; it could be important."

Castle dropped his hands into his lap, still holding the ring, looking down while she answered.

Beckett watched Castle from the corner of her eye as she spoke.

"Beckett. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Ok, I'll be there. Thanks."

Beckett opened her mouth then closed it after hanging up. Finally, she recovered the use of human speech.  
"Murder down-town. Castle - "

"It's ok, go."

She inhaled sharply.

"I don't want to just leave you here in the middle of a proposal."

"You have a lot to think about and I don't want to rush you; plus I know how involved you get in your cases, so, you don't have to give me your answer now. I'll wait until the case is over."

"Castle, that could take - "

"It's you. It'll be a few days; a week tops - and that should give you more than enough time. I hope you understand I'm gonna sit this one out, ok? But you come see me when you're done."

He stood up and kissed her on the forehead.

"I'll keep this safe for you," he whispered, stowing the ring away in his pocket.

She watched him walk away, trying to will her legs to move, trying to force her whole body to stand up; she had a fresh crime scene to go to. Murder didn't stop just because she'd gotten a job offer in DC and her boyfriend had proposed. She was still a homicide Detective, and she had a job to do.

* * *

Castle jumped.  
"Oh, Jeez, mother, you scared me. Were you waiting behind the door that whole time?" He entered the loft and closed it behind him.

"Well? What did she say?"

"She didn't say anything."

"Well that's not a good sign."

"Because she got a body-drop."

"So, you didn't have a chance to ask?"

"No, I asked. She didn't have a chance to reply. I told her to give me her answer after the case is over."

"Darling, that could take weeks - by which time she could be halfway to Washington."

"I'll follow her to Washington if she'll have me. There's a lot we need to talk out, whether she says yes or no, but we can't do that while she's in the middle of a murder investigation."

* * *

The address was for St. John's Church. Karpowski greeted Beckett at the entrance.

"Hey, Karpowski, how's it hangin'?"

"Uh, an unfortunate choice of words."

Beckett arched an eyebrow.

"You'll see," she said, raising an eyebrow in return.

She turned back towards the church.

"Where's Castle? Aren't you two usually attached at the hip?"

"Uh, he asked if he could sit this one out. He's so busy; just finished his book, he's got cover art to pick out, edits to go over..."

Karpowski nodded, accepting the information she was being given even if she didn't quite believe that was the whole story.

"Fair enough," she said, entering the building with Beckett in tow.

It was a nice little church - or Beckett supposed it normally was, assuming there wasn't usually a woman hanging from the crucifix, a huge, damp, red stain on her back.

"Whoa," Beckett said.

"I know, right?" Karpowski said. "I've heard of Catholic guilt but this is taking it a little too far."

"It wasn't suicide," said Lanie from across the room, standing next to the crucifix. "Judging by the amount of blood, she was alive when her hands were tied to either side and her legs fastened with rope with her body facing the cross before being stabbed in the back with some sort of sharp, pointy object. I'll have to get her back to the lab before I can tell you more."

"Uh, yeah, I know; this isn't my first murder. I was making a joke. Jeez, I miss Perlmutter. That guy gets me."

"And I miss Castle; his jokes are actually funny," Lanie said.

Karpowski glared at her.

"Ok, ladies; this is a crime scene - and a place of worship. Try to have a bit of decorum, please."

"Speaking of Castle, where is he?"

"Oh, well, he's getting on in his years. Two cases in one day were a little too much for him."

"Mm-hhmm," Lanie said, regarding Beckett with a reproachful 'We'll talk about this later' gaze.

"So, who's our vic?" Beckett asked, walking around to look up at her partially obstructed face.

"Marjorie Chettle, sixty-one," said Karpowski.

"Marjorie Chettle, the socialite?"

"And fashion legend," Lanie said. "I own three of her dresses from last year's fall collection."

"Never heard of her," said Karpowski.

"Now, why doesn't that surprise me?" Lanie said, eyeing the other woman's drab grey attire.

"What was Marjorie Chettle doing in a Catholic church in down-town New York?" Beckett wondered out loud.

"This is her husband's church, they were married here by his friend Father Patrick Bryan," Karpowkski said, indicating a distraught looking priest. "Just took his statement. She asked him to meet her here; said it was important but she didn't say what it was. He found her like this at around 2:30 pm. That's when he made the call to 911."

"Does the husband know?" Kate asked.

"Yeah, Father Brian called him right away," Karpowski replied. "He was here when I arrived. He was pretty upset."

"Yeah, well, I can't blame him," Lanie said, "unless he's the killer and just pretending to be upset."

Karpowski rolled her eyes.  
"He was taken back to the precinct for questioning,"

"Which number husband is he?"

"Number seven," Lanie said.

"Lucky seven," Karpowski said.

"Not so lucky for Ms. Chettle," Kate said, taking out her phone.

"_What's up, Beckett_?" Esposito answered.

"Are you done takin' that statement?"

"_Uniforms are processing him now_."

"Great; I could use a couple more investigators."

_"Body-drop_?"

"Yeah, St. John's Church."

"_Oh, yes, we caught that one. Ryan's interviewing the husband._"

"Well, that's lucky. Karpowski and I are just leaving now."

"_So, five of us working the same case? Won't that be crowded_?"

"Actually, it'll just be four."

There was a pause.

"_Ok. We'll see you_."

"Yeah. Ok. Bye."

* * *

He narrowed his eyes as he stared down at the phone.

"Hey," said Ryan, approaching him.

"Hey," said Esposito, shaking himself out of his reverie. "How'd the interview with the husband go?"

"About as well as you'd expect. Guy's torn up." He nodded towards the phone. "Who was that?"

Espo lifted it for emphasis  
"Oh, just... Beckett. She and Karpowski caught our new case."

"Karpowski?"

"Yeah, I guess you and I were busy, so..."

"Right, right."

"But it's weird. I don't think Castle's coming."

"I don't like it, Javi. Something is definitely going on with them and whatever it is, it's not good."

"Well, it's their business."

"Right. You're right."

Espo turned to leave.

"It's just -" Ryan stopped mid-sentence and sighed.

Espo turned back around  
"You know what? It's killing me too. "

"Right? I mean, Beckett said she had something important to tell someone, and assuming it was Castle, I'm thinking it didn't end well. You know, bro - "

"Don't even say it, Kev."

"Well, maybe I wasn't too far off the mark before," he said in hushed tones. "Maybe she _is_ - "

"Kevin!" Espo hissed. "I am warning you."

Ryan checked to make sure no one was listening in to their conversation.  
"Well, accidents happen. Maybe she wanted to ease him into the conversation; maybe he said he didn't want more kids; they fought - "

"Kevin Ryan, I am thrilled for you - honestly, I am - but good God, man, you are a trained Detective and _tha_t is pure speculation. Now, Beckett said she would let us know what's going on; until then, let's get to work trying to solve a murder like two grown-ass men!"


	2. Change

**Disclaimer: I do not own _Castle_. No money will be sought for this work.**

**Word-Count: 1,695**

* * *

"What about Alexis?" Martha asked. "How did she react when you told her?"

"I didn't."

"Richard, are you telling me you proposed to a woman without consulting your daughter? That is a big decision, one that is entirely your own, of course, but one she should be made aware of."

"I don't want to say anything before I get Kate's answer. Alexis has been through too much, has overcome too much lately to be dragged into my drama. I need to be certain it's going to happen."

"Nothing is certain, Darling."

"Yes but... she's probably going to say no."

"If you're so sure of that, why did you ask her?"

"Just in case she says yes. I can't go through life wondering, what if? What if I had just... laid my cards on the table, despite the risk? What if it had paid off, if only I hadn't been too scared? I can't live like that, mother. If it's over, it needs to be a clean break. And if it's not over... then it's worth the risk. It's worth everything."

"Richard, if Katherine says yes, she'll be moving in here - "

"Not necessarily; we might move to Washington."

"Oh." She went quiet.

"What is it, Mother? I'd've thought you'd be encouraging me to go off and live my life."

"Well, yes, yes; I would encourage it. It's just..."

"Don't worry; I'd still let you live here rent-free."

"Oh, it's not that."

He stared at her and after a moment, started to grin.

"You would miss me."

"Well, of course I would miss you; you're my son."

"You've grown accustomed to my face."

"Oh, Darling, you know Broadway references get me choked up. Yes, yes, I have enjoyed living with you for the last four years, I'll admit it. And if you left, I -"  
She cleared her throat, placed both her hands on his and smiled up at him. "But if you decide that this is the right thing to do - for Katherine, for your relationship, for yourself - I would support it."

"I know." He smiled.

Martha smiled back.

"Well, well, enough of this sentimentality; I have a class to teach and you have a daughter to talk to."

"Mother -"

"Richard, I told you as soon as Chet proposed. You and Alexis have always had the same sort of open dialogue that we have. Why should that change now?"

* * *

"Hey, Becket," said Ryan when she walked in. "Karpowski."

"Ryan. Esposito," Karpowski nodded.

"Hey, guys."

"Detective Beckett?"

Beckett looked up to see Gates standing at her doorway, smiling.

"Could I see you in my office?"

"Uh, yeah, sure."

* * *

"So, I've heard you got the official offer. Congratulations."

"Thank you, sir. I haven't accepted it yet. I have a lot to think about."

"Yes, you do; and you don't need to rush it. Just know that you have started an active case; and I would appreciate it if you tried to close it before you went off saving the world."

Beckett smiled.  
"Uh... sir, can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"When you said that you would have jumped at this kind of opportunity at my age... what changed? What would stop you from accepting now?"

"Well, aside from not being as in shape as I once was... I didn't have children when I was your age. I wasn't married. When your circumstances change, your priorities change. It's different with you. Don't get me wrong, Detective; I love my family, and I wouldn't trade them for any job in Washington - not even the Presidency - though I think I'd do a better job than the current Commander-in-Chief, just between you and me."

"I think you would, too, sir." Beckett smiled.

"But, you, Detective, you've your whole life ahead of you, nothing tying you down."

"But that's just it. What if I... what if I want to be tied down?"

Gates raised her head and paused, her hands together.

"On the record, as your Captain, I would tell you that you have plenty of time to start a family; that you should focus on your career; that you have an opportunity to save a lot of lives, to really make a difference. Off the record, as a woman, finding the right person to share your life with is something most people never manage in a lifetime. If you find someone who's willing to stand on a bomb for you; someone you trust so completely that you don't doubt them even when all evidence tells you otherwise; you shouldn't ever let them go.  
"But I'm not going to tell you either of those things, because it's entirely your decision. Besides, if... your significant other is half the man I think he is; I can't imagine he would ever make you choose."

* * *

"Did Gram say what time she'd be back?"

"No; just that she'd be working late teaching classes, which just gives me more one-on-one time with my brilliant daughter."

"So, Dad, what did you want to speak to me about?"

"Can't a father share a meal with his only daughter without having something to speak to her about?"

"He can; but I was here earlier today and you didn't mention anything. It was all very last-minute and out of the blue."

Castle smiled, sighed, put down is cutlery and wiped his mouth.

"Alexis, I made a very important decision today that could affect the rest of my life."

Alexis nodded slowly, putting down her own cutlery.

"Ok. What did you decide?"

"To ask Kate to marry me."

Her eyes widened.  
"Oh, wow, that's big."

"Yeah, it is."

"Dad, are you sure about this? I mean, it's been a year and things are going well; you don't have to rush this."

"It's not like I want to marry her tomorrow. I just feel it's time for Kate and me to move to the next level."

"But, Dad... what about the whole 'never ever getting married again' thing?"

"Sometimes, when you've been burned more than once, it's hard to get back in the kitchen. But _you_ are with that trip to Costa Rica; and I'm so proud of you for not letting fear win. Kate and I have reached a serious point in our relationship. I want to share my life with this woman. If she gets sick or injured I want to know my insurance will cover it because she won't take handouts but if we're married it would be _our_ insurance cover. I want us to be able to see each other in hospital and find out the details no matter how serious it is. I want her to have the option to take time off work if anything happens to me so that she can grieve properly. I want her to be able to make medical decisions for me that I can't make for myself. I want her to have a say in how I'm buried and how my funeral should go. I want to have the option to move to a "families only" neighbourhood if we decide to have kids."

"Kids?"

"Yes, Pumpkin. I... don't even know if we will have kids but I'm open to the idea of having more maybe one day."

"Huh."

"There are so many things that come along with being married - rights and responsibilities I don't have right now but I want. I want to be her husband."

"Wow, Dad, well, if you're serious, if it's what you really want... "

"It is."

"Then I'm happy for you," she said, reaching for his hand across the table.

"Thank you," he said, squeezing her hand.

"So... have you thought about how you're going to ask her?"

"Uh..."

Alexis read his awkward look.  
"You already asked her, didn't you?"

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you before - "

"It's ok, Dad. You don't need to ask my permission. But you do have my blessing. So, what did she say?"

"We were interrupted; she's got a new case she's working. We'll talk after that's wrapped."

"Yeah, well, you guys have a lot to sort out; like where are you going to live? Is she going to move in here? Are you going to move in with her? Are you going to find a new place all together? Is Beckett even ok with living with Gram or would it be awkward?"

"Yeah, about that... there's something else. Kate got an interview for a job in DC working for the Attorney General."

"Are you serious? That's awesome! Oh, but if she gets it, that'll mean she'll have to move right?"

"Yeah it would."

"Which would mean_... you_ would have to move."

'Not necessarily."

"Dad, you can't start off a marriage in different states."

He sighed.  
"I know. If she moved to Washington, I would go with her; but she might not. We'll talk about it. But... if we do, would you be ok with that?"

"Well... yeah, I mean, Washington's still way closer than Stanford. You could still visit and any way, she hasn't heard back from them yet, has she?"

"I think she has. I think... I think she was going to tell me their decision - and hers - today but I wanted her to know where I stood."

"Oh."

"What?"

"Nothing; it just... doesn't sound very romantic."

He shrugged.  
"It wasn't."

"Well... aren't proposal's supposed to be romantic?"

He smiled, shaking his head.  
"Alexis, you are so wise beyond your years that sometimes I forget you're still so young. There are certain things you can't learn from a textbook. Yes, proposals can be romantic and epic; and I am usually all over that; but at the end of the day, it's about building a foundation for a life together. Marriage isn't just some great romantic adventure, Alexis, it's hard work - I would know - and unless you are truly committed, it doesn't matter how romantic and exciting it is in the beginning, you're doomed to either failure or spending the rest of your life being completely miserable."

"Wow, Dad. My little boy's growing up. At least tell me you got down on one knee."

"Of course."

"Well, good."


	3. Washington People

**Disclaimer: I do not own Castle. No money will be sought for this story.**

**Word Count: 1,744**

* * *

"So, where are we with the case?" Beckett inquired as she emerged from Gates's office.

"Husband's alibi holds up," Esposito said. "He was at work all day until he got the phone call."

"And what about the priest?"

"One of his parishioners, Glenda Masters, confirmed he visited her until around two," Ryan said. "She's been having health troubles and the good Father's been visiting. Phone records show he got the call around two-oh-five. He made the call at two-thirty-one. With traffic, that wouldn't have given him enough time to get there."

"We have any idea why yet?"

"Farther Brian mentioned she was considering converting to Catholicism" Karpowski said. "He thinks it might have had something to do with that but he's not sure. "

"Maybe _he _doesn't but her son might."

"She has a son?"

"Product of marriage number six," Esposito said. "He's in interrogation room one."

Beckett narrowed her eyebrows.  
"Got his father with him?"

"He'll be coming in tomorrow. Kid's nineteen; he doesn't need a guardian."

"Nineteen? " Beckett echoed. "Huh. How long was she married to husband number six?"

"Three years," Esposito said. "There was a long gap between husbands six and seven."

"I can take this one."

"Great. Thanks, Karpowski," Beckett said.

"No problem," Karpowski said as she left.

"So, " Kevin said, "uh... Beckett?"

"What's goin' on, Kate? You said you had somethin' to tell us and that's the second time in the past twenty-four hours Gates has pulled you into her office."

"Uh, yeah, yeah... guys, why don't we take this to the break room?"

They followed her and shut the door behind them, all sitting down at the table.

"So," said Kevin, "what's up?"

"You guys remember Stack?"

"_Agent _Stack?" Esposito queried.

She nodded.

"Well, yeah, Beckett, that case was just over a week ago," Kevin said.

She nodded again.  
"Um... Stack offered me the opportunity to have an interview with the Deputy Director of the FBI, for a job opening in Washington."

Ryan's eyes widened.

Esposito stood up.

""Wow," said Ryan, "that's amazing - "

"Did you go?"

Beckett and Kevin stared up at him.

"Javi, bro, this is a good thing; we should be happy for Beckett - "

"Yes," Beckett said. "I went."

"When? Yesterday morning, when Castle didn't know where you were?"

She bowed her head.  
"Yeah."

"That's what you fought about, isn't it?"

"It is."

Esposito nodded, pacing back and forth. "Ok," he said, taking a deep breath. He exhaled as he sat back down. "So, did you get the job?"

"I got an offer."

"And?" Esposito queried.

"I'd rather discuss this with Castle first."

"Weren't you going to do that this afternoon?" Ryan asked.

"I was, but the call came in before I had a chance to... tell him."

"Well, whatever you decide, we'll support you, right, Javi?"

"Right, of course."

"Really?" Beckett raised her eyebrows.

"Yes. I'm happy for you. Look, I'll admit I was a little blind-sided by all this... but you should make the right call for your life, whether that's staying here or going to Washington. And I hope that whatever's going on between you and Castle, you guys sort it out."

"Ditto."

"Thanks, guys, that means a lot."

"Hey, we're your team, whether you're working with us or not. Nothing is ever gonna change that," Esposito said.

* * *

"So, what did the son say?" Beckett asked Karpowski.

"He said something about her being in a weird mood ever since she got back from a trip to Los Angeles a few days ago."

"Yeah, the husband mentioned the same thing; apparently, she visited some churches," Ryan said. "She was interested in talking to members of the clergy wherever she went; wanted to find out a much as she could."

"Hmm, maybe that had something to do with whatever she wanted to talk to Father Brian about," said Beckett. "Maybe she found out something that made her think twice about being with the Catholic Church."

"I hope you're not suggesting what I think you're suggesting," said Ryan.

"Hey, I was raised Catholic, too, Bro," said Esposito. "I don't like it any more than you do; but it's a possibility we need to explore."

* * *

"So, Lanie, what have you got for me?" Beckett asked when she arrived at the morgue.

"I think I've identified your murder weapon," Lanie said. "I found splinters and larger wood fragments in the wound, which was made by something with a rectangular shape. Considering where she was murdered - "

"You think she was killed with a wooden crucifix."

"Affirmative. It was approximately five-by-ten centimetres in diameter."

"So, she was tied backwards to a crucifix and stabbed to in the back with a smaller crucifix."

"This is precisely why I stopped going to church when I moved out of home."

"Thanks, Lanie. Anything else?"

"Nothing else about the murder, but what about you and Castle?"

Beckett took a deep breath, not sure where to begin.

"I got an official offer from the Deputy director of the FBI for a job working for the Attorney General."

"Wow! Congratulations, girl, I'm proud of you."

"Thanks." She paused. "I didn't tell Castle about the interview."

Lanie sucked in a breath.

"We had a fight when he found out. Then, he..."

"Broke up with you?"

"Asked me to marry him."

"Ok, so, he went the other way. Wow, did he really propose?"

"Got down on one knee and everything."

"Well, Castle always thinks a big gesture will solve everything. Now, don't do anything hasty. You know, he probably just panicked; I'm sure you two can work things out. If you just explain to him that you can have a committed relationship without having to get married - "

"Wait, you're just assuming I said no?"

Lanie's eyes bulged.  
"You said _yes_?"

"No. No, the murder was called in before I could answer. We're gonna talk after the case."

"If you hadn't been interrupted?"

Beckett took a deep breathe.  
"I would have said yes," she said. "That's the problem. We haven't even talked about marriage; and right when we're about to discuss DC he springs this on me, and I'm ready to say yes without considering the consequences?"

"Well, I'm glad you've come to your senses."

"Actually..."

"Wait, you're not still considering saying yes, are you?"

Beckett shrugged.  
"So what if I am? We_ have_ been dating a year. I'm not going to pretend it hasn't occurred to me before."

"Girl, what are you thinking?"

"That... I love him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him?"

"Why do you need a piece of paper to spend the rest of your lives together?"'

"We don't but... that piece of paper would unite us legally. We'd be partners in the truest sense. Getting married is the smart thing to do, the sensible thing to do, if you plan to spend the rest of your life with someone. Plus, I... always imagined myself getting married one day. You know, when I found the right guy. And... Castle is the right guy for me;actually, probably the only person I could tolerate spending the rest of my life with."

"Girl, you know how I feel about marriage. I think it can work for some people - Ryan and Jenny, for example - but Castle is not one of those people. Just look at his track record."

"So, he's been married before."

"_Twice_."

"I don't care. That stuff doesn't matter to me any more."

"The other day you said you didn't want to ask about the future because you were afraid of the answer."

"But now he's given me an answer."

"Does that change your decision about DC?"

Beckett sighed.  
"Maybe. I don't know."

"Girl, you really need to - "

"Talk to Castle," they said in unison.

"Yeah, I know."

"Listen, Kate, if marrying Castle is really something you want to do, I'll support you; but in that case, you need to go into this thing with your eyes wide open."

"I know; trust me, they're open. I'm not a hundred percent sure I'm going to say yes yet."

"But you want to."

"I _really_ want to. It's just..."

"Complicated?"

Beckett laughed.  
"Yeah, big surprise, huh?"

"Well, whatever you decide, I do hope you guys can work it out."

"I hope so, too."

* * *

"Hey, Ryan, check it," said Esposito the next day, pulling out a tiny blue onesie with a police-shirt design complete with drawn-on badge and cuffs. "Isn't that adorable?"

"Hey, hey," said Ryan in a hushed voice, pulling the item down and shoving it into Esposito's desk.

"Hey, watch the fabric - "

"People around here know Jenny and I were trying. If they see that, they're gonna know!"

"Well, so what if they know? _I _know."

"Yes, but Jenny doesn't know you know. We're waiting until the three month mark. Once we're out of the danger zone, we're gonna tell family, then we're gonna invite you, Lanie, Castle and Beckett out to dinner and tell you, then we're gonna tell Jenny's friends and then we'll make a formal announcement to everyone - including co-workers."

"By formal announcement, do you mean Facebook?"

"Well... yeah."

"So when's the three month mark?"

"Couple weeks."

"How do we know Beckett'll even be in town - or that she and Castle will still be together?"

"Oh, Javi, don't be so negative; anyway even if she takes the job, which is an amazing opportunity, she'll have to put in her two weeks' notice and who says Castle won't go with her?"

"His kid goes to college in New York."

"College being the operating word. As in, nineteen."

"Parenting doesn't stop after your child comes of age, Ryan. You gonna up and leave your kid when he or she turns eighteen?"

"He wouldn't be abandoning her; she's an adult and hopefully by her age my kid would be able to stand on his or her own two feet."

"But... if they leave, they'll become Washington people. I used to answer to Washington people. They're not fun people."

"They'll still be Castle and Beckett."

"But they won't be here."

They exchanged a look.

"So, do you think the way our vic was killed was some sort of religious statement?" Ryan asked.

Esposito shrugged.  
"It's possible."

"I just hate the idea of my faith being used to justify such a horrible, vicious, ugly crime."

"Yeah, well, you're Catholic. You should be used to it by now."


	4. Mercy

**Disclaimer: I don't own Castle. No money will be sought for this work.**

**Word Count: 1,215**

The rest of the day was a whirlwind of ex-husbands. Beckett was interviewing husband number six, Neil Finn.

"Our marriage was her longest - 'til Alan. At first - at first it was just... spontaneous. Marjorie was wild back then. When she found out she was pregnant, things changed. She changed - in a good way. She started working from home, joined a twelve step program, put some serious work into our relationship."

"But you still divorced."

"We tried, you know, we really tried. It ended amicably and we agreed to stay friends - not just for Peter's sake. We are..." He sighed. "_Were _genuinely close. But we realised that even though we loved each other, we just weren't _in_ love with each other like we used to be. We both deserved more."

"How did you feel about Alan?"

"I liked him. Still do. He's a great guy. We all got along."

"Your son told one of our Detectives that he spent a lot of time with Alan."

"Yeah, and I encouraged it. I understand you need to explore every option. I _am_ her ex-husband; it makes sense. And I'm willing to cooperate, I really am. I was not jealous of Alan; I consider him a friend. He called me as soon as he saw the body so that I could be the one to tell Peter."

"Were he and Marjorie having problems?"

"Not that I knew of. You could not find a nicer guy. He wouldn't hurt a fly, let alone his wife. They adored each other."

"You can't think of anyone who would want to hurt her?"

"Well... my ex-wife made a lot of enemies in the fashion industry. That's the only thing I can think of. Everyone who truly knew Marjorie loved her."

"Her husband's priest mentioned she was considering converting."

"Yeah, to share Alan's faith with him. She was always looking to be closer to him."

"What did you think of it?"

"Look, I'm not a big fan of everything the Catholic church stands for and Marjorie knew that; but I had an open mind. Alan's family are catholic and they were all very nice. Alan treated all of Marjorie's gay friends with respect; he didn't care that she had been divorced so many times and he wasn't exactly devout; they lived together for years before they got married."

"What about Peter?"

"We raised our son to choose his own path. Peter was willing to support his mother and his step-father. He loved them both."

"And her family?"

He almost laughed, leaning forward.  
"Marjorie comes from a long line of W.A. . They were not happy when she married Alan. If they knew she was thinking about converting? They'd be even less happy. But I can't imagine any of them killing her over it."

* * *

"So, any luck finding out where she went?" Beckett asked.

"Marjorie visited three churches in the Los Angeles area," Karpowski said. "We're making calls. Plus we're tracing a call she made a few hours before her death."

* * *

"Ok, I just got done talking to father Brian," Ryan said. "He has no idea what could have upset her but he'll make inquiries to his contacts in that area and let us know if he hears anything."

Beckett narrowed her eyebrows as she looked over his shoulder. Hastings was seeing the father out onto the elevator. They seemed friendly.

"Hastings!"

She came over to them.

"How do you know Father Brian?"

"I pulled him over for speeding yesterday. Let him off with a warning; even gave him a police escort to the church with the siren on to get through traffic. Said he needed to meet a parishioner. Said it was urgent. Sweet guy."

"What time did you get him to the church?"

"Around two pm."

"The same time he was supposedly at Glenda Masters' house," Ryan said.

"Espo." She looked up at Esposito, who was already on the phone.

"On it."

* * *

Father Brian pulled the murder weapon out of its hiding spot; the secret compartment under the floorboard kin his office. He was making his escape when he saw a man sitting in the pews and froze.

"Good evening, Father," said Ryan.

"Good evening, Detective Ryan. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I think you know."

The priest sighed.  
"Would I be right to assume that my church is surrounded by a group of your colleagues?"

"You would. You know, your friend, Alan, says you were the star of the track team - I'm not surprised. Detective Esposito called downstairs maybe thirty seconds after you got on the elevator. You were apparently out like a shot the second those elevator doors opened. Amount of uniforms down there, that's impressive."

"You must think I'm a horrible person."

"It doesn't matter what kind of person I think you are. The fact is that you broke the law; the highest law: you took a human life. It's my job to take you in. I don't always enjoy my job, Father, but that is my duty."

"You keep calling me Father. You must know by now - "

"I know you're not a real priest. That's what Marjorie found out in California, isn't it? She met with a man, Father Scott James. He went to Seminary School with you. Claimed you never finished. A few hours before her death, Marjorie got a call from a man she'd been trying to get in touch with: Father Brian. You found a priest with your name and date of birth, used his credentials to get this job; bribed several clergy members to look the other way. Your church was none the wiser."

"I begged her not to say anything. I begged her; but she didn't even care about all my Parishioners, my job, the fact that I could have gone to prison, all she cared about was the fact that her precious marriage was null and void. What did it matter? She'd been married so many times; besides, if she'd just kept her mouth shut, the marriage would still be legally recognised."

"So, you tied her to the cross?"

"I didn't know what else to do; she was going to call Alan; I panicked; but she wouldn't stop screaming, so, I..."

"That's the murder weapon?" Ryan nodded at the crucifix.

The priest nodded.

"I stabbed her. In the back. There was so much blood."

"I bet lots of people think this church is named for St. John, the Evangelist, don't they?"

"Uh... yes. Isn't this the part where you arrest me?"

"We'll get to that. It's named for St. John, the merciful, isn't it?"

"Yes. I - I have done a lot of good over the years. I wasn' t so great at memorising scripture but I preach it every day. I preach about mercy. Something I didn't show Marjorie." said Father Brian, on the verge of tears.

"Doesn't matter," said Ryan, standing up and showing him a digital recorder before pocketing it again. "You confessed. That's the first step. " He walked over to him. "Please drop the weapon, Father."

The priest complied.

"Come quietly," he said, pulling out a pair of hand-cuffs. "Take responsibility and He will have mercy on you. You will be absolved; and you will join Him in paradise."


	5. Ours

**Disclaimer: All rights to Castle are reserved by its copyright owners. No money or credit will be sought as a result of this work.**

**Word Count: 1,690**

* * *

Officers had to hold Alan back when his cuffed friend was escorted in.

"Tell me it's not true," he demanded. "Just tell me there's been a mistake. You've been framed."

"I'm so sorry, Alan."

"No." He shook his head. "No, not you. You wouldn't."

"She was going to ruin everything, Alan. It - it was me... I killed her," he said, looking him square in the eye.

Alan stared at him for a moment, then lunged, struggling against the officers restraining him as the priest was taken away.

"You son of a bitch! You killed my wife! You killed my wife! I hope you rot in hell where you belong! You are dead to me! Dead to me!"

He finally slumped against one of the officers, sobbing.

* * *

Ryan and Esposito watched as Alan and his son were escorted into a private room by Beckett.

"Hey, Ryan, you ok?"

"Yeah, bro."

"I know this must have been hard on you."

"Yeah. Uh... yeah. This guy's been pretending to be a priest for over thirty years. I'm just... wondering how many people he's married in that time; how many confessions he's taken in confidence; how many christenings and first communions he's performed. I'm just opening my eyes up to how much my family trusted our priest. How many people you have to trust when you have a child; religious leaders, scout leaders, teachers, counsellors, coaches, nannies - people you've never met before; and you have to give them the benefit of the doubt. Alan was best friends with this guy since school and he still had no idea who he really was; what he was truly capable of - and it scares the crap out of me."

"Well, yeah, Kevin, we talked about this before; it is a harsh world to bring a baby into; but there are a lot of good people in the world, too; trustworthy people. Like me. People who will do their best to look out for this kid. And you and Jenny; you're gonna be great parents; you're gonna do your best to keep that little one safe. That's all you can do - that and hope. Just hope.".

Ryan smiled.  
"Thanks, bro." He pulled the onesie out of Esposito's desk discretely and looked at it, his smile slowly widening into a broad grin. "This really is adorable."

"I know, right? There's even a little baton drawn on."

"Yeah, I don't know how Jenny would feel about that."

"Why? It's not like it's a gun."

"What if it's a girl?"

"What, you sayin' a woman can't be a cop? Seriously? You answer to to strong professional women in law enforcement and you're going to raise your daughter to think she can't follow in your footsteps because of her gender?"

"Of course not. I just mean blue is a boys' colour."

"That's just as bad! Gender doesn't have a colour. Little girls love blue."

"Oh, you're suddenly Mr. Feminist now?"

They continued to argue well into the night.

* * *

Peter was able to calm Alan down long enough for Beckett to explain things to him.

"Mrs. Masters has been going through Alzheimer's; he actually met with her earlier in the day and took advantage of her memory lapses to use her as an alibi."

"I would have forgiven him. If Marjorie had told me, I would have forgiven him; I would have helped him and I would have been there for him. Who wins now? He's going to prison, I've lost my wife, Peter's lost his mother... it's all so senseless."

"I'm so sorry," Beckett said, "for your loss and the circumstances. And on top of it all, to find out you weren't really married - "

"Oh, we were married, Detective. It may not have been legal but we were together fifteen years; fifteen years of solid commitment; fifteen years of loyalty and fidelity; I don't care what the law says. She was my wife."

"Wow, fifteen years."

"Yeah, took us both a while before we decided to make it legal; and we only did it for practical reasons. See, I didn't want to be just another number and Marjorie had given up on the institution for obvious reasons."

"What changed her mind?"

"Tax stuff and... I had some health issues. She had better insurance..."

"It wasn't just that," Peter said. "She wanted it for a while. She loved you so much. She wanted to call you her husband. She wanted to be your wife. She said everyone else had just been a warm-up. You were _it_. You made her believe in marriage again. You made her believe in forever. Thank you, Alan."

The two men embraced.

* * *

"Are you sure you want to spend the night?" Castle asked as they neared the door.

"Yes, Dad, I don't have any classes until noon tomorrow, it's cool."

He smiled, ruffling her hair.  
"Thanks, Pumpkin."

"Any time."

He turned back to open the door.

"Then, what do you say to - "

They froze.

Beckett was standing in the middle of the loft.

"Uh... Hi, Beckett," Alexis said.

"Hey, Alexis."

"Uh, I'm going to go up to my room for... reasons."

She ran up the stairs.

"Hi," said Beckett.

Castle shut the door behind him without taking his eyes off her, moving slowly towards her.

"Hi," he replied.

"I used my key, I hope that's ok."

"Of course it's ok; that's why I gave it to you."

She nodded.

"So, I guess the case is over."

"It is. You would have loved it, Castle, a woman was practically crucified by a fake priest because she was going to expose him."

He smiled.  
"That does sound like my kind of case," Castle said. "So, I guess you've made your decision."

"I have."

He nodded.  
"Ok. Ok, let me hear it."

"I got the job."

"Congratulations."

"Yesterday, I was going to tell you that I wanted to take it."

He took a deep breath.  
"Ok."

"I was going to ask you to come with me."

He swallowed.  
"You _were _going to?"

"Things are different now, Castle. You changed everything when you asked me that question."

"Kate - "

"Please let me finish. I got very emotional, thinking it was my last case - which is ridiculous because even if I say yes I have to put in notice. I was thinking about my job, and everything I've done, all the people I've worked with, and I realised... the precinct is my home. And it's always hard to leave home. But sometimes you need to. When you said all those things, the way you looked at me, I thought you were going to break up with me. My heart broke. Then you asked me that question; and I was so shocked, by the time I realised what was happening, all I wanted to do was kneel down, say yes and kiss you, just keep kissing you, and never stop.  
"I've had more time to think about this rationally. Castle, we haven't talked about where we're going at all over the last year, and suddenly you're asking me to marry you? And what about your history? How do I know you can even make a marriage work? How do I know you even want to marry me? I know you said you'll marry me whatever I decide, but how do I know this proposal wasn't just a desperate attempt to keep me here?  
"Without having a serious conversation about all these things, I would be crazy to say yes right now."

Castle nodded, looking down.

"So I must be certifiable."

He looked up to find she was much closer.

"Yes, Richard Castle, I will marry you."

He raised his eyebrows.  
"Yeah?"

She smiled, brushing his lips softly with her own as she stroked his hair.

"Yeah," she whispered.

Castle stared at her for a moment, then pulled the ring out of his pocket.

She held out her hand, which was shaking slightly, as he placed it on her finger.

He cupped her face and examined her for a moment before drawing her in for a leisurely, lingering kiss, resting his forehead against hers when it eventually ended.

"So..." he whispered.

"Mmm," she replied, linking their hands.

"DC."

"I haven't called them back yet. That's not just my decision any more. It's not just my life any more. It's ours."

He smiled.  
"_Ours_. That's what I want."

"Me, too."

"I think you should take the job."

"Really?"

"If it's what you want, then it's what I want for you. I want - I want us to move to DC together. I want to keep the Loft for Mother - and for us when we come back to visit; hotels are expensive - but I want to find a place just for us and I want to live there with you as your husband. I want to keep writing; and I want you to keep saving the world. Even though I won't be able to witness it first-hand any more, I will still be overwhelmingly proud of you, because I know how amazing you are. I would feel safer knowing you were out there protecting my country." He brushed a tear from her cheek with his thumb. "Hey, hey, hey, what's wrong?"

She shook her head.  
"Wrong? Everything is right. We want the same things. I feel like this huge weight's been lifted off my chest and I'm just... happy and... we have an audience."

Following her gaze up the stairs, he saw Alexis and Martha spying on them.

"Oops," Martha said. "Busted."

"Should we give you a moment or can we congratulate you now?" Alexis asked.

Castle raised his eyebrows and looked to Kate, who smiled.

"Of course you should congratulate us; who else am I going to show off this awesome ring to?" Beckett said, displaying her finger.

"You heard the lady. Get your butts down here."

Alexis and Martha instantly ran down, hugging and congratulating them. Castle breathed a heavy sigh, smiling as he watched the women in his life gushing over the ring he'd bought, a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.


	6. Promise

**Disclaimer: All rights to Castle are reserved by its copyright owners. No money or credit will be sought as a result of this work.**

**Word Count: 1,731**

* * *

Robert Latchley combed a hand through his hair.  
"No," he said to the person on the other end of the phone, "no, you're completely missing the point. I don't care about the photos. I just want to know how you are; how you've been; how your health is - no, that's not a threat. You don't under - hello? Paul!" He threw the receiver in frustration.

He looked up to see his wife staring at him from the doorway.

_What's wrong_? she asked him in sign-language.

_Nothing, _he signed back. _It's a work thing_.

_Has it got to do with -?_

_Yeah, sort of; _he signed, cutting her off, _ but I'm taking care of it. Everything's going to be alright._

_I know it will, _she signed. _I believe in you._

_I love you._

_I love you ,too._

She approached him and lent down to where he was sitting, kissing him on the head before taking a step back.  
_Ben's asleep; May just brushed her teeth - she's getting settled in now. You gonna read to her, Rob?_

_Oh, do you mind doing that tonight? I gotta make a couple more calls._

_Well, you might wanna pick up the phone._

He laughed._  
Yeah, that might help - I'm sorry..._

_Hey, this has been hard on all of us, especially you. It's understandable that you'd get frustrated; it's a frustrating situation. As long as you don't take it out on me._

_Never. Rosie, you've been so amazing through all of this._

_Well, I am your wife. It's my job._

_I should give you a raise._

_How about a back-rub?_

_I don't know if you'll be up by the time I go to bed. Can we take a rain-check? _

_Sure. Just don't stay up too late. Ok?_

_I won't. Night._

_Goodnight._

_Wait, wait wait. Turn your monitor off;I'll take care of Ben if he wakes up._

_When he wakes up, you mean._

_Yeah, don't worry about it. You need a good night's sleep._

_You're so considerate.'_

_Well, I'm your husband; that's _my _job._

They smiled at each other.

Robert's smile slowly faded as she left the room. He took off his glasses, cleaned them, put them back on and sighed.

* * *

Rosie was shaken awake by her young Step-Daughter, May. The light was on.

_What is it?_ she asked her, squinting.

_Ben's crying, _she replied. _I tried feeding him, burping him, checked his diaper - I even sang to him._ _He just won't stop._

Rosie glanced at the clock.

_5:07 am._

She looked at the empty side of the bed then back to May.  
_Where's you_r _father_?

_I don't know; I thought he was with you._

Rosie nodded, getting up to see her son. When she entered his room she found him in obvious distress.

"Oh shh, shh, shh," she said to him aloud as she picked him up. "It's ok; it's ok."

He started to calm down.

"Yes, my beautiful boy, see? Everything's alright. Let's find your Daddy, ok? Yeah, does that sound good? Come on."

She met May in the hallway.

"Go back to bed," she told her with her voice. "Get a little more sleep. You've got School in a few hours. Thank you for your help, Sweetie."

_What about Dad?_

"He probably fell asleep at his desk again. We're just gonna check on him."

_Ok, goodnight._

_Good Morning,_ she corrected.

They smiled at each other and May went to bed. He wasn't in his study. She checked the Dark Room. He wasn't in there either. When she turned on the kitchen light to find her husband lying in a pool of blood on the kitchen floor with a knife in his chest, she was the only one in the neighbourhood who didn't hear her screams.

* * *

Beckett stared at the ring on her finger as she lay naked beside a sleeping Castle in his bed.

He stirred.  
"Morning," he said, nuzzling her neck.

She smiled.  
"Morning." She turned her head to give him full access to her mouth.

"Mmm," he sighed against her lips. He sat up and followed her eyes to her finger. "Still hasn't sunk in yet?"

"Not quite yet," she said, leaning back against him as he put this arm around her, pressing his lips to her forehead.

"Well, it has only been two weeks," he said.

"I don't know; I think two weeks is a reasonable amount of time. For example, after two weeks we could possibly...start telling people?"

He looked down at her.  
"You want to start telling people?"

"Yeah, I think I do. I mean, I'm not ready to announce it on page six, but at least my Dad and the boys deserve to know - and since we're still waiting on my resignation to be processed, so, we can't tell the guys we're leaving yet..."

"Well, your Dad already pretty much knows so it's just - "

"What do you mean?"

"Uh... I sort of... called him before I asked you, you know, just to let him know - "

She gasped.  
"Richard Castle, did you ask my father for my hand?"

"No, no, you're not property; the choice whether or not to marry me was entirely your own to make - and lucky for you, you made the right one." He smirked.

She poked her tongue out at him.

"I asked for his blessing - which he gave, tentatively."

She frowned.  
"'Tentatively'?"

"He said we had a lot to talk about, and asked me how I would feel if you chose DC. I was surprised he knew about that." "

"Yeah, I asked him for advice. I hope that's cool."

"He's your father; of course it's cool. Mother gives me advice about you all the time."

"_What_?"

"So, anyway, I said I'd support you either way, he said marriage is hard, not something to be taken lightly or rushed, you and I had a lot to discuss, but if we both decided marriage was what we wanted, he wasn't going to stand in our way."

"Well... that's good."

"It's better than a no." "

"Hey, my Dad's been supportive of us from the beginning. He likes you a lot. He knows how happy you make me. He even commented you're the longest relationship I've ever had - "

"I am?"

"Well... yeah."

"Wow, that's a lot of pressure."

"Castle, you already knew I intended to make you the longest."

"I did?"

"Uh, yeah, when I agreed to marry you. The rest of my life pretty much means you have it in the bag."

"Right," he chuckled, avoiding eye-contact, "right, of course." He cleared his throat. "So, uh, that dinner tonight, it's just going to be the six of us. You think that would be a good time?"

"I think that sounds perfect."

"And you're sure Lanie hasn't already told Esposito?"

"Girl-Code, Castle; she wouldn't do that."

''Well last year you seemed to think - "

"That was if Alexis told her, I didn't think she would swear her to secrecy. I know better now. Quit worrying. Lanie knows I wouldn't want him to find out from her. This is better coming from us."

Her phone rang.  
"Beckett," she answered.

She sat up.  
"Yeah, of course. Uh-huh. Thanks. See you there." She hung up.

"Do we have a body?" he asked, pulling her back down.

She smiled.  
"Two very warm bodies here, one very cold body downtown," she said, kissing him sweetly. "Come on," she said, patting his thigh and getting up.

* * *

"Wait, wait," Castle said, stilling her as they neared the crime scene. "You're forgetting something."

"What?"

He looked down at her ring finger.

She followed his gaze.  
"Right. Well, you know, I thought I could just put my hand in my pocket."

"Kate, you don't think people will find that a little odd?"

"You know what? I have a pair of gloves in the car," she said, turning. "I'll go get them."

He stopped her.  
"Kate, you can't wear gloves over that ring."

"_Why no-ot_?"

He chortled.  
"Because it's not comfortable. Now stop being silly and take it off."

"Ok, fine you win," she grumbled, complying. "I just..." She stared wistfully at the silver band of diamonds in the palm of her hand. "I hate leaving it in a drawer, Castle. It belongs on my finger. It's a symbol of our promise to each other. I don't want to hide that."

"Well, unless you want to make an engagement announcement right now and end our partnership a week early - "

"I don't." She sighed. "I don't," she repeated.

He held out his hand.

"Give it here. I'll keep it safe. "

"Oh, nuh-uh. I don't trust you."

"You don't trust me? Your fiancé'?"

"Shut up, that's not what I meant."

"Oh, now you're telling me to shut up?"

"I trust you with my life, and I trust you with my heart. I just don't trust you with my stuff."

"Why not?"

"Because you don't take care of your own stuff let alone someone else's."

"That's not true!"

"Oh yeah? What about your helicopter, your tank – ?"

"You tricked me – "

"My vase? My earrings – "

"I bought those earrings – "

"And you bought this ring, too, I don't want this to end up on Gates' finger."

"Ok, don't even joke about that." His face softened. "Kate, are you just looking for excuses to keep wearing my ring?"

She shrugged.  
"Maybe."

He smiled, taking her ring hand and kissing her finger.  
"This is a nice ring, Kate, but once I've put your wedding band on this hand, I'll never ask you to you take it off."

"Promise?"

"I promise. I just wish there were a way you could keep wearing this one, too."

"Actually..." She turned with her back to him. "Un-do my chain, Castle."

"You want to - ?"

"Wear it around my neck with my mother's ring, yes."

He did as she asked and handed it to her. Her engagement ring joined her mother's wedding ring back around her neck and she tucked them both beneath her top.

"That's better. This way I can keep it with me all the time."

He smiled.  
"You ready now?"

"Yep, all ready!" she said, beaming as she walked towards the house where the murder had taken place.

Castle shook his head, his own grin brimming at the surface of his lips, before following her.

* * *

**The monitor referred to in this chapter is the Bellman Visit Baby Cry Transmitter and is specifically designed for deaf and hard of hearing parents.**


	7. Silent But Dead

**Disclaimer: The author recognises and undersatnds that she has no legal right to Castle or any ideas that may resemble the ones in this story.**

**WC: 1,481**

* * *

Lanie was leaning over the body when they entered the kitchen. Esposito was standing next to her.

"Call came in about half an hour ago," he said. "Rosie Latchley claims her husband was alive at approximately 9:30 when she went to bed."

"Nine-thirty?" Castle echoed. "That's sort of early."

"She's pre-law at NYU. She has an early class in the morning - or, should I say, had? She might not want to take a class right now - any way, when her eight-year-old step-daughter woke her up to alert her of her six-month-old son's cries at five-oh-seven, she thought it was odd he still wasn't in bed. She took the baby out with her to check on him. That's when she found the body of Robert Latchley. All the neighbours we've interviewed so far confirm they heard a woman screaming at around ten-past-five in the morning. The handle of the knife seems to resemble the other knives on the rack on the bench; and one's missing."

"Yes," said Lanie, "it does appear to be a kitchen knife; however, we won't know for sure until I get back to the lab and extract it."

"Front door was ajar when uniforms got here," Esposito said. "So far, no other evidence has been found."

"The young girl's been picked up by her Grandmother; she's going to stay there tonight," Ryan said, approaching them. "Her biological mother, June Sarkisian, has been contacted; she and Mr. Latchley had shared custody. She's going to come in with the child this afternoon. I thought getting the statement right away might be a little much for a young girl her after everything she's going through."

"Good thinking," Beckett said.

"Lividity and body temperature suggest he was killed no later than approximately three am," Lanie said.

"Where is Mrs. Latchley now?"

"Living room," Ryan said. "An interpreter's going to meet us at the station so we can get a full statement."

"Interpreter? English isn't her first language?"

"Oh, it's her first language; she just doesn't hear it so well."

"She's deaf?" Beckett asked.

"Affirmative,' Ryan said.

"Was the victim deaf, too?"

"No, far as we can gather, she was the only non-hearing individual in the household. We've been improvising with pen and paper; and she does speak and read lips."

A uniformed officer approached them.

"Detectives; Mrs. Latchley's mother, Julia Gould, has arrived. She's offered to interpret on her daughter's behalf."

* * *

_"When I went to leave, he had just gotten off the phone and he was angry."_

_"_Why was he angry?" Beckett asked her while Julia interpreted she and Castle sitting across from the two of them in the living room.

Rosie sighed before signing her reply.

"_Rob was having some health issues. They were getting worse and they were making it harder for him to work."_

_"_What did he do_?" Beckett asked._

_"He was a photographer. He's been short-sighted since he was nine but he wore glasses and it was fine. In the last year it's gotten progressively worse. We've seen all kinds of optometrists and other eye specialists; they said it looked like he would eventually lose his sight completely and there was nothing they could do to stop it; they don't know what the cause is."_

Beckett's eyes widened.  
"He was going blind?"

"_Yes."_

"That couldn't have been easy, considering..." Caste started to say.

"_It's ok, you can say it. I'm deaf. Raising two kids with one deaf parent or one blind parent is a challenge; having both would be an even bigger challenge - but I've seen it done. We were more concerned about... his work."_

"A photographer who can't see," Castle said. "Might've been tricky. "

"_He was devastated. Photography is all he ever wanted to do; it's his passion - ever since we were kids."_

"You knew each other that long?" Beckett asked.

_"Yeah, we were friends since we met in Mr. Hubert's Third Grade Class; we lost touch after high-school and we reconnected at our ten-year reunion. I think he was trying to find a way to get as much work as he could before it all went away. Whatever the conversation he was having on the phone, I don't think it went well. He promised he'd be in bed soon, we said goodnight and those were the last words he spoke to me."_

_"_Mrs. Latchley, did you know of anyone that might've wanted to harm Rob_?"_

"_No. Rob kept to himself a lot. He didn't have a lot of friends but he didn't have any enemies - at least, none that I know of. That phone-call did make him pretty angry, though._"

"Do you have any idea who it might have been?" Beckett asked.

"_None. He didn't say."_

"You didn't hear -? Sorry, of course you didn't," Beckett said.

"_It's ok, Detective. It takes a little while to get used to if you haven't been around Deafies much."_

"Thank you for understanding," Beckett said. "So, before you went to bed, was the door open or closed?"

"_Closed; I always lock the door before bed and last night was no exception. "_

"There was no sign of forced entry," Beckett said. "The door was left open."

"_Then, whoever did this must have been let in by Rob_."

"How long have the two have you been married?"

_"It would have been three years next month." _

She paused, looking away.

Beckett handed her a tissue.

"Thank you," her mother interpreted.

"Would you characterise your marriage as happy?"

Julia didn't interpret that.  
"I'm sorry; why do you need to know that?"

Rosie looked confused and asked her mother what was going on.

"Mrs. Gould, we appreciate you helping us out," Beckett said. "We understand it's difficult; but we do need to rule Rosie out as a suspect before we can proceed; we'd like to do that as soon as possible. Please ask the question."

Julia sighed and did so.

"_Yes, I would. Very happy."_

_"_Before you went to bed, were all the knives in their holder?" Beckett asked.

_"Yes, we always put them straight back after they're washed and dried It was Rob's turn to do the dishes tonight. We have an eight-year-old and an infant in the house. We are vigilant about safety."_

"Ok. Thank so much, for your time, Mrs. Latchley. That's all for now. We will be in touch with further questions as the case progresses."

_"Of course, you have my full cooperation. I'll do anything to help you find whoever did this."_

* * *

"So, according to May, she woke up about ten minutes before she woke her step-mother up," Ryan said later that morning at the precinct. "She went straight to the baby's room; didnt' see or hear anyone."

"What did she say about the knife?" Castle asked.

"She says she wasn't allowed to touch the big knives at her Dad's house; says she only ever used the butter knife."

"Well, we'll see about that once CSU runs the fingerprints. What about her relationship with her father?" Beckett asked.

"She... was visibly upset about his passing. Kind of difficult to watch, actually."

"And the step-mother?"

"She did not have enough nice things to say about her. You'd think her Step-Mother hung the moon, the way she spoke about her. Though I got the impression from the look on the mother's face, she didn't exactly share the sentiment."

"Did you talk to her without the kid?"

"Grandmother just picked May up. Thought you might want to do the honours."

"Oh, Ryan," she said as she passed him, "you know me so well."

* * *

"I'm not a suspect, am I?" June asked Beckett as she sat across from her and Castle in the interrogation room.

"Everyone's a suspect," Beckett said. "If you're innocent, and straightforward with us, you have nothing to worry about. Now, what was your relationship like with your ex-husband?"

"Great; it was really amicable. I mean, I knew I wouldn't have a good chance at full custody with my drug history."

"How long have you been clean?"

"Nine years. Since the day I found out I was pregnant. Besides, Rob was such a good Dad. It just made sense for her to live with him; I got her weekends, holidays and half the Summer."

"What about Rosie?"

"I'll admit, I didn't like her at first. It's still hard to hear the way May goes on about her. But... she's a way better role model, mother and she never tried to inch me out. I used to feel left out with all the signing, and I wasn't thrilled with the idea of her being left alone with my daughter; I thought that just because she was deaf, we wouldn't be able to protect her like the average adult would - but I've been educated. I'm even learning how to sign. You do whatever you have to do; take my prints. I didn't kill Rob."


	8. Lock it in

**Disclaimer: I renounce any claim to any legal rights over my ideas being broadcast in an episode of Castle. I reserve my rights to publish my own work on the internet. Please do not do so without a link to the original story and/or crediting me as the author. Thanks.**

**A/N: In the previous chapter, the italics were supposed to indicate Rosie's mother speaking on her behalf. She wasn't actually speaking. Sorry if that confused some people.**

**WC: 1720**

* * *

"So, you guys all good for seven o'clock tonight?" Ryan asked back in the bullpen once June had gone home.

"Yep," Castle said.

"Looking forward to it," Beckett said.

"I'll be there with bells on," Esposito said.

"Lanie, too?" Ryan inquired.

"I think so," Esposito said. "She told you she's coming, right?"

Ryan narrowed his eyebrows.  
"Wait; aren't you two going together?"

Esposit shrugged.  
"No, why would we?"

"Aren't you guys supposed to be back together?" Ryan asked.

"It's complicated," Esposito said.

Castle and Beckett caught each other's gaze and quickly looked away, both grinning.

"You know, this is going to be the first time the six of us go out together like this," Ryan said.

"Yeah, I think it'll be fun, so long as there's no talk of marriage," Esposito said, shooting Ryan a look.

"What'd be so bad about that?" Castle asked, avoiding their gazes.

Beckett shot him a look of her own. He raised his hands.

"Only the fact that the last time _his wife_ brought up that completely inappropriate dinner conversation," Esposito replied, "Lanie and I broke up."

"Well, I don't think you have to worry about that this time around," Ryan said, "you can't break up when you're not together."

"Hey!"

"Hey… guys?"

They turned to Beckett.

"This is still a place of work."

"Sorry, Beckett," they both said in unison. "We'll see you tonight. I'm sure we'll all have a _lovely_ time. Castle and I actually have something we want to talk about."

Ryan's head snapped up.  
"What, really? What is it? News? An announcement?"

Esposito glared at him. He shrugged.

"We'll tell you tonight, it's just something we're ready to share with you. Come on, Castle, let's go to the break-room. I feel like coffee."

"Well, you can stay here," Castle said, "I'll bring it to you."

She bit her lip, shifting her weight while playing with her hair.  
"I like watchin' you make it."

He grinned.  
"Ok!"

Together, they left for the break-room, leaving Ryan and Esposito staring after them.

_"Something they're ready to share with us_," Ryan said.

"They're probably going to tell us that she's taken the job," Esposito said.

"Why would they be so giddy about it?"

"Because he's probably going with. Maybe that's why they fought; he thought she was going to leave without him, she asked him to come and now they're going to live happily ever after."

"I don't think they'd be _that_ excited about leaving; I mean, I think they'd be a little sad, a tad wistful."

"Did you see the way Beckett was the other day? She's past that stage now. She's ready to move on. They both are."

"What about Castle? He hasn't been sentimental or demure lately."

"You don't get it, do you? We're just supporting players to him. Becket was always the star. Yeah, he joked around with us when he was bored but she is the only reason he shows up, not us. Leaving us? Just not a big deal to him."

"I can't believe what I'm hearing right now. Castle's our boy; he's practically one of us. He takes us to hockey games, lets us drive his Ferrari. You called him your other partner. You don't _really _believe he doesn't care, do you, Javi?"

"Man, I don't know what I believe. _You_ don't_ really_ believe she's pregnant, do you?"

"It's a possibility."

"He's makin' her coffee."

"It could be de-caff."

Esposito sighed.  
"You know what? Maybe we should stop gossiping and get back to work."

"You're right, " Ryan said. He paused. "How cool would it be though, if we had kids at the same time - ?"

"Bro - "

"Beckett and Jenny side-by-side with their strollers, our kids in little matching onesies - "

He grabbed him firmly by the shoulders.  
"Lock it in, Kev, lock it in."

* * *

You wanted to see me, sir?" Beckett said in the doorway of Gates' office.

"Yes, Detective Beckett, I just want to say that your resignation has been officially accepted. The chief of Detectives, the commissioner and the Mayor all wanted me to forward their congratulations and wish you luck in your new job. I know you'll do us all very proud."

"Thank you, Sir."

"Just remember that even though you're moving to a much higher position than mine, for the next week, you still answer to me. Don't expect any special treatment. For now at least, you're still Detective Beckett."

"I understand. And, uh, Sir? Ryan and Esposito still don't know. I'd like to tell them myself in my own way."

"Of course. My lips are sealed."

* * *

Beckett returned to the break-room to finish her coffee.

Castle stood up when she entered.

"So?"

She nodded, taking a deep breath.  
"My resignation has been accepted."

"Wow. There you go. So, I guess it is official now.""

"Yeah." She exhaled, sitting down. "Guess it is."

"How do you feel?"

"I don't know. Scared. Excited. Queasy."

He nodded, a smile on his lips.  
"I felt the same way when I killed off Derek. Taking your career into a new direction is a big change. It can be scary, going into the unknown, leaving behind what's comfortable and familiar."

"Castle, I knew I couldn't work here forever; and I definitely knew I couldn't work with the same people forever but... I never actually thought about the day it would end. That day is approaching. Next week. Just one more week, and that'll be it. It'll be over and I'm not actually sure how I'm supposed to feel about that."

"Well, I, for one, am going to miss this place. But hey, at least you and I will still get to work together."

"Uh... Castle, that's not how it works. I can't just bring you along like a piece of stationery or a coffee mug. The FBI isn't the NYPD."

"Maybe not but that doesn't mean I can't still shadow you."

"Castle, this is the _Attorney General's Office. _The jurisdiction goes a little higher than the Mayor's office."

"I got into the C.I.A."

"Yes, but not because of you, because of... the thing we're not supposed to talk about."

"Yeah, well, who says that won't work this time around?"

"You don't even know how he found out about that last time; how can you even guarantee he'll know about what you're trying to do? You have no way to contact him - and didn't you say he was going off the grid?"

"Well, even without him, the FBI's a little more within my grasp. I do know people; important people and I have got an excuse: Derek Storm; Shooting for a little more accuracy with the FBI stuff. Now that we know you're definitely going. I can get the ball rolling."

"Well, I'll be working closely with the FBI and answering to the Director and Deputy Director of the FBI... but I won't actually be an FBI agent."

He shrugged.  
"Close enough."

"Ok. Ok, if that's what you want to do, Castle, but... is that the only reason you're going to DC with me? Because you think we'll still be working together?"

"No. No, I'm going because it's a fantastic opportunity for you and I want to support you. I'm going because I want to be with you. I'm going because I want to start a life with you."

"And if after all that schmoozing you don't get in -"

"It won't matter. I'll have you, my writing and Abe. I'll be content." He sighed. "I told you to take the job with that intention any way, and if that's the way it's supposed to be, so be it."

"Castle, it's most likely that this is coming to an end soon; do you get that? You and me solving crimes; theory building; you bringing me coffee at work; you stalking my desk - that's going to end next week. How do you feel about that?"

"Sad - but happy, too. I've loved every second I've spent here with you. And I'm gonna miss everyone here - especially the boys."

"Me, too. It's gonna be pretty hard to leave them."

"But... I'm ready to move on. Whether I'm working with you or not, this is going to be a new adventure for us. We're going to live in our nation's capital. We're going to get married. We're going to live together. It's bittersweet; emphasis on the sweet."

Beckett regarded him for a moment, then put her hand over his, gazing into his eyes as he smiled back at her.

* * *

The six of them were seated together at a nice restaurant. Beckett was wearing her ring but had strategically hidden her hand behind her handbag when they entered and was now keeping it under the table. Everyone had made their drink order but Beckett. Jenny had asked for water.

Castle felt a foot stroking against his leg. He looked at Beckett, who grinned at him.

He grinned back.

"Uh, Champagne for me, thanks."

"Are you sure about that?" Ryan asked.

"Yeah, we have red wine practically every night. I'm in the mood for something sparkly."

Ryan's mouth fell open.  
"You drank red wine last night?"

"Yeah, it's kind of a ritual, a way to wind down after a long day of crime-solving," Castle said.

"And you still do that? I mean, there's nothing stopping you from partaking in that particular... indulgence?"

Beckett narrowed her eyes.  
"No."

Esposito glared at Ryan and he promptly shut up.

"_Told you_!" Esposito hissed moments later.

Castle had a sharp intake of breath as he felt the bare foot brushing his crotch."

"I'm going to go use the rest-room," Beckett said, getting up - but the foot remained where it was.

In the next moment, Castle's chair was on the ground and he was on his feet. Lanie looked from him to Esposito in horror.

"Lanie, that's _my_ _- foot_!"

Beckett chuckled.  
"It's ok, Rick," she said, kissing him on the cheek, "I'm sure it was an honest mistake - and, hey, Lanie, I hope that settles your question about who has the bigger - _feet._"

Esposito's mouth fell open and he glared at Lanie.  
"You guys compare our... _shoe-sizes_?!"

"It's just girl-talk," Lanie said quietly.

Esposito shook his head.  
"The size of a man's _feet_ is personal!"


	9. Announcements

**Disclaimer: I acknowledge my lack of rights and promise not to abuse the ones I do have under any circumstances.**

**WC: 1,764**

* * *

"Well, any way," Ryan said once Beckett had returned to the table, "there's something, um, we wanted to share."

He took Jenny by the hand.  
"We're having a baby!" they said in unison.

The entire table erupted in congratulations. Beckett and Castle exchanged a glance. He shook his head; she nodded and quickly slipped her ring into her bag before getting up to hug Ryan and Jenny, as did they all.

"So, Beckett, you said you and Castle had some big news to share," Ryan said.

"Uh, yeah, well, it's nowhere near as big as your news, but... " Beckett held Castle's hand, exchanging a quick smile with him. She took a deep breath. "I accepted the job in DC. You are looking at the newest member of the Attorney General's Office."

There was a pause.

"Wow, Kate, congratulations!" Lanie said. "Isn't that great, Javi?"

"Yeah, sure. Congratulations."

"Wow, Kate!" Jenny said. "I - is that a big deal? It sounds like a big deal."

"It's a big deal, honey," Ryan said. "Congratulations," he said, hugging Beckett.

"Thanks, Kevin."

"I'm going to go get some air," Esposito said, leaving.

"Javi -" Lanie said.

"Let him go. He just needs a little time to process it," Ryan said, sitting back down. "You're not leaving for a while, right?"

"Uh... 'Beckett said, getting back into her own chair, "well, I'm not actually starting work for a while. I have to train first; but I'm leaving the Precinct in a week."

"A week?!" Ryan echoed. "That's - - that's such short notice."

"I know, I know. Castle and I made the decision two weeks ago but we agreed to take a week to cool off, you know, really mull the decision over to make sure we were absolutely certain this was what we both wanted; and once we decided it was, we had to wait for my resignation to be approved; I just got word from Gates today."

"So... what are you two going to do?" Jenny asked. "Have you decided?"

"We're going to find a place in or near DC and we're going to move there together," Castle said.

"That's a big decision, Castle," Ryan said.

"I know, and it's not one either of us made lightly," Castle said. "But we both knew we couldn't work together forever and Gates' plausible deniability thing was making it impossible for us to move in together officially... You know that I have loved every second that I've gotten to spend on the field and at the Precinct with you guys and I'm going to miss it tremendously; but we both felt this was the right step to take."

"Don't you have a daughter?" Jenny asked.

'Yes, Alexis. She's nineteen and living in a dorm at Columbia. Of course, I discussed it with her. I will come back to visit as much as possible - so will Kate, when she has time."

"So this is definitely not Goodbye,' Beckett said. "Just... see you later.'

"What about... everything that happened with Paris?" Ryan asked. "Won't that make it difficult?"

"I can't wrap her in bubble-wrap just because this terrible thing happened. I need to let Alexis have her independence. She's an adult and I trust her."

"What about the rest of the world?" Ryan asked.

Caste smiled.  
"When I found out I was going to be a father, I freaked out, too. I wanted to run a background check on the Obstetrician. You do need to be vigilant, but children need to make their own way, too. It's your job to give them the tools to do that."

"Thanks, Rick," Jenny said. "That's great advice."

Beckett put her arm around him.

"He is such a good father. You should see him with Alexis. You're both going to be great parents, too, aren't they, Castle?"

"Oh, definitely. Just wait, you guys. You are going to love your child more than you ever thought it was possible to love another human being."

* * *

"I can't believe Ryan's going to be a Dad," Beckett said back at the loft a couple of hours later.

"I know; it's amazing. So, what are we going to do with our other piece of news? I mean, we can't steal Ryan's thunder."

"Well... maybe we should wait until we leave; tell them then. Some good news might cheer them up."

"I can do that. Anyway, all in all, I think this was a pretty great night," Castle said as he unfastened his tie.

"Except for the part where Esposito walked out," Beckett said.

"Well, he cares about you. I think he'll realise you're doing what's right for you and he'll be ok. It would probably be the hardest on him, you leaving. He's your Scarecrow."

"Scarecrow?"

"The one you've known the longest; the one you're going to miss the most."

"I'm goin' to miss them all the same, Castle."

"Come on, Kate. You and Esposito, you've always had something special the rest of us could never tap into. You're like brother and sister."

Beckett opened her mouth, paused, then closed it, shaking her head.

"Ryan is the Tin Man, 'cause he's the Heart of the group; and Lanie's the Wicked Witch of the West."

Beckett laughed.  
"Why the Wicked Witch?"

"Because of her wicked deeds!"

"Is this about the foot thing?'

"I think you know it wasn't my foot. She touched me in... naughty places!"

"She thought you were Esposito."

"How could she not know the difference?"

"It was an honest mistake."

"_Righ_t; we both know she's wanted me from day one."

Beckett laughed.

"Why are you laughing? She flirted with me the moment we met and she hasn't stopped since!"

"Her? _You're _the one who's always staring at her chest."

"_Three times_ in four years."

"You counted?"

"Well, it doesn't matter what she does with her foot, because I am taken."

"Well, so is she."

"Is she?"

Beckett sighed.  
"I don't actually know what the hell's going on there, to be honest."

"They're together, they're not together..."

"Uh, yeah," she chuckled. "I do not miss that."

"Miss what?"

"That place that they're in; where things are "complicated" and neither knows what they are. I feel so lucky to finally be in a simple relationship where we both know where we stand."

"You do? We do. Of course. Uh, yeah, I guess _it is_ nice."

"Mm," she said, helping him with the buttons of his shirt. "Very nice. So, if Esposito's the Scarecrow, Ryan's the Tin Man, Lanie's the wicked witch, I'm assuming I'm Dorothy - "

"Correct," he said, sighing as his hands slid up and down her body.

"Then what does that make you, the cowardly lion? 'Cause that makes sense."

"No, I'm Toto, your faithful companion."

"Toto kept running off and getting into trouble. Hey! You _are_ Toto.'

"Very funny," he said, leaning down to kiss her.

* * *

When they entered the Lab, Beckett discretely texted Ryan to call her back in five minutes.

"Oh, hey, guys."

"Hey, Lanie. So, what's the skinny on the knife?"

"You'll have to speak to CSU for the make and model but seemed like an ordinary kitchen knife to me. They said they'll get the prints back to you ASAP.'

"That's good. What about the stab-wound?"

"From the angle and depth, I would say our assailant was short, about 5'5 with low upper body strength."

"So, a woman?" Castle guessed.

"Not necasarily, Castle. It could have been a short, weak man - but yes, the perpetrator is most likely female."

Shortly after, Beckett's phone rang.  
"Oh, it's Ryan. I've got to take this. You guys'll be ok in here, right? Great." She left the room.

"So... guess it's just us and Rob here."

"Yeah, guess so," Castle said.

"Listen, Castle, I realised I didn't apologise last night. I was just so mortified. I am really sorry, I didn't mean to - I really thought you were Javi."

Castle regarded her for a moment.  
"I believe you. Apology accepted."

She smiled.  
"Thank you, Castle. I am really happy for you guys. Kate is head-over-heels for you. There's no way I would try to sabotage that."

"I know; I guess I overreacted. I just... I thought Beckett would be the lat woman to ever touch me there."

"Aw, that's kind of sweet. Well, there's no reason she can't be. Starting from now. And I don't think you overreacted. You're engaged. No other woman should be touching you there. I approve."

"Approve of the way I freaked out or of the engagement?"

"Both. Castle, I'll admit I was a little taken aback when I found out but if this is something you're both serious about than you'll get no arguments form me. I'm just... a little bit in awe of you, The way you picked yourself up and dusted yourself off. No way would I be able to get back on the horse after two failed marriages. How do you do it?'

He shrugged.  
"I love her. I'm ready to commit the rest of my life to her. The past is the past. I'm ready for the future."

"Well, Castle, I don't think it's that simple - "

"Hey, guys; it turns out Ryan actually has a lead," Beckett said, sticking her head in the door.

"Isn't that why he called you?"

"Yeah. Right. Of course. Any way, Castle, we need to go."

"Alright, thanks for the apology," Castle said, following her out the door.

"Any time," she called after them, her eyebrows furrowed.

* * *

"Hey, Ryan, what you got for me?' Beckett asked.

"Tech ran a trace on a number Rob called repeatedly on the night of his death to a Paul Mann. They went to Elementary and High School together on Staten Island. He says Paul started calling him a week ago about some photos he had published in a magazine. They were in the same photography class and Paul called up his old photography teacher asking for the negatives from an old project; Rob seemed to think he'd given him the wrong ones, claiming they were _his _photos, not Paul's; but Paul had heard about his eye problems and insisted they were his. Staten Island Police have taken his fingerprints - we just got off the phone to CSU, we only found two pairs of prints on the knife - and it is just a kitchen knife: Rob's and one other unidentified individual's. "

"Not Mrs. Latchley?"

"She did mention her husband did the dishes that night," Castle said.

"Fingerprints weren't a match to the ex-wife or the kid, either," Ryan said.


	10. Why

**Disclaimer: If my ideas end up on Castle, I will be happy. I don't need money or credit for that. It's not my show. I have no rights to it.**

**WC:1.174**

* * *

Castle and Beckett met with Dale Hubert, Paul and Rob's High School Photography teacher, and his Granddaughter, Paige.

"Ow!" Castle exclaimed after hitting his head in the doorway of Mr. Hubert's bungalow. Castle rubbed his head.

"I'm really sorry," Paige said. "This was custom-built for my Grandpa and you're... a little taller."

"It's ok," Castle said. "Those are some nice pictures," he said, indicating the wall.

"His passions have always been teaching and photography isn't that right, Grandpa?"

"Oh, yes, I've taught Elementary, High School, even taught a few adult photography courses at the learning centre."

"How long has your Grandfather been living with you?" Beckett asked.

"A year; since he was diagnosed. Thankfully, the Dementia hasn't progressed past the early stages yet; but we've started to see signs that it's getting worse. I'm a nurse; I'm not married and I don't have any kids. It just made sense. I don't want him in a home."

"Mr. Hubert, do you remember Paul Mann?"

He smiled.  
"Little Paulie Mann. Always stealing the pencils off my desk." He chuckled. "Yeah, I remember him."

"Did you also teach him when he was older?"

"Photography," he said after moment. "Yes, he was not untalented."

"Do you remember him calling to ask for some photos?"

"Uh... no, I'm sorry."

"I remember," Paige said. "Yeah, he, um, wanted to get some old negatives. Grandpa had some canister's sorted out from every student all organised alphabetically; but I'd had a long shift that day; I could have grabbed the wrong one by mistake."

"How could you grab the wrong one? I have them colour-coded. All the Ms were Pale green."

"I'm sure I grabbed the green folder; at least I thought so; I'm sorry. Anyway, I got a call not long after the photo was published from Rob Latchley. I thought he was going to get Grandpa in trouble but it turned out he was more interested in Grandpa's health."  
"His health?"

"Yeah, apparently a lot of people who lived and worked at the Elementary School ended up having health problems. He thought Grandpa might have been mis-diagnosed."

"Had he informed the school?"

"I don't know. We were going to discuss it later. We had an appointment for one pm the day after he was killed."

"I had it in my diary," Mr. Hubert said.

"He's kept diaries since he was a kid."

"We're gonna need copies of all your diaries going back to when you taught Robert," Beckett said.

"Of course," said his Granddaughter.

"Do you think we could also have a copy of the negatives?" Beckett asked.

* * *

Castle and Beckett were granted permission by the Staten Island police to speak to the principal of the Elementary School in question, Mary Abbot.

"Let me start by saying how sorry I am for Mr. Latchley's passing," she said.

"Did Mr. Latchley contact you?"

"He did. We did some follow-up research. Turns out anyone who spent a lot of time on the east side where Mr Hubert taught was three times more likely to have health problems; vision impairment, loss of mobility, hearing loss, memory problems. That classroom was demolished some time ago. It's now a shed. Of course we are still very concerned and we're testing the soil."

"Do you know what may have caused this?"

"No, this has been a school for over a hundred years. Before that? We're not sure. There are no factories for miles. It's a mystery."

* * *

Castle was reading Hubert's diary when Beckett brought him a coffee.

He smiled and took a sip.  
"Mmm, I've taught you well, young Padawan."

She smiled. "I figured I should get some practice. We'll be married soon and I'll have to make you coffee every day."

He grinned.

"What's that?" she asked.

"One of Hubert's diaries. I think Rob may have been right. Look at this entry."

Beckett looked at a diary from the period Robert was teaching photography.

"Now, look at a more recent entry."

She did.

"See the difference?"

'"Your hand-writing can change later in life."

"I thought that too. So, I called Paige and asked her to fax me a photocopy of earlier entries. Look,"

She complied.  
"The early entries match the later ones."

"Exactly."

"So, whose handwriting is that?"

He produced a hand-written letter.

"I found this between pages. It's a letter from his wife when she was visiting relatives."

"The handwriting matches."

"Paige said he was diagnosed after her Grandmother passed away. You know what this means?" Castle asked.

"The wife was covering for Hubert's memory loss."

"Exactly," said Castle.

Becket looked over the diary entry.

"Oh, no."

"What?"

Beckett looked up.  
"I think I know who the killer is."

* * *

Paige and her grandfather met with Castle and Beckett at Mrs. Latchley's home.

Thanks for coming," Beckett said. "This is Peter Smith; he'll be interpreting for Mrs. Latchley."

He waved.

"Why are we here?" Paige asked.

"We thought it would be more helpful to your Grandfather," Castle said.

"Why?"

"We think your Grandfather was here the night of the murder."

"Why would you think that?"Paige asked.

"See this diary entry? He wrote that his appointment was at one am, not one pm. The door was open even though Mrs. Latchley locked it."

"You think my Grandfather witnessed the murder?"

"Yes," said Beckett. "We thought maybe if we re-created the scene it might jog something."

"Grandpa? Do you remember anything?"

"I..." he looked around and rubbed his eyes. "I don't know; maybe."

"Maybe if we did some roleplay. Castle, you stand over here where the body was found."

Castle did so.

"Ok, Mr. Hubert, you stand here with your back to the sink."

He did so.

"Great."

"Mr. Hubert, don't lie to me," Castle said.

"Lie?" he asked.

"It's all part of the recreation," Beckett said.

"I know you knew about the school making us sick. Your wife knew."

"Beatrice? What are you talking about?"

"What are you doing.?" Paige asked.

"Shh," Beckett said.

"Your wife knew this whole time and she covered for you. And because of that, people got worse and worse and now my children are going to grow up with two disabled parents! All because of your wife.'

"Don't you talk about my wife!"

"You put my work in the wrong canister, didn't you?"

"I would never - "

"If your wife hadn't died, we might still not know what she did to us!"

"Shut up!"

He grabbed the knife from the kitchen bench and stabbed Castle.

The plastic knife fell to the floor and the old man stared at him in horror.

"Grandpa?"

"Oh, no," he said. "I think... I think it was me."

"You're confusing him. You can't - "

"We're gonna check his fingerprints," Beckett said.

"Then what was the point?" Paige asked.

"The man has a right to know," Castle said. "At least now he remembers why."


	11. Free

**Disclaimer: This story is for entertainment purposes only. I have no rights to the characters or universe.**

**WC: 1,108**

* * *

"I hate cases like these," Castle said back at the precinct. "I prefer it when it's just a bad person doing a bad thing. I always look for the shades of grey but sometimes I hope they're not there."

"Well, if it's any consolation, I don't think any judge in his right mind will see him fit to stand trial," Beckett said.

"Well, that's something. And his wife and his children will get closure. What's happening with them, anyway?"

"Uh, his ex-wife has offered to move in so they can raise their children together; and she's accepted."

"That's good. What about the other stuff?"

"Well, she wants to stay informed but when the cause is determined she doesn't want to pursue legal action. She was born with mild hearing loss; it didn't star t to get sever until age eight. By the time she left the school it was profound. She could probably prove that it was inflamed by the environment but she just wants to get on with her life."

"What about her mother?'

Beckett smiled.  
"Yeah, her Mom wanted her to move in with her but... if you love someone you gotta let them be free."

He smiled and sighed.  
"Yeah. I suppose you're right."

"Thinkin' about Alexis?"

He nodded.

"When do you have to leave to take her to the airport?"

He checked his watch.  
"Ooh, now. Um, I'll see you at the loft?"

"Of course. Good luck."

"Thanks."

They kissed discretely and he left.

She turned around to find Esposito looking at her.

"Uh... hey."

"Hey."

"So, this case..."

"Yaeh."

"Javi..."

"Look, I'm sorry, Kate. I was rude and I over-reacted. I really am happy for you.'

"Thanks."

There was a pause.

"Can I ask you one question though?"

"Anything."

"Are you sure about this moving in thing? I mean are you only doing it because you don't want to break up?"

"No, Javi, this has been a long time coming."

"I don't doubt that but... moving together is a whole different ball game. I mean, do you really think Castle's gonna be happy in a new city where he doesn't know anyone, away from his family with nothing to do while you go off around the country solving crimes with a new partner?"

"Castle wants this as much as I do."

"Are you sure about that? Or is he just saying that to make you happy? Maybe you should think about what you're really asking him to give up."

* * *

Martha and Castle stood side by side as they saw Alexis off at the airport.

"You got everything you need?"

"Yep, I have a first-aid kit, bug repellent, maps, and all my study materials."

"You have enough pairs of underwear?"

She rolled her eyes.  
"No, I'm going to go commando for the whole trip."

"Well, I guess that's practical."

"Yes, Dad, I have plenty of underwear."

"Remember to take plenty of pictures for us," Martha said, hugging her.

"I will, Gram." She turned to Castle. "See ya in six weeks," she said, putting her arm around him.

Castle held her close, kissing her on the forehead.  
"Have a safe trip, Sweetie."

He put his hands on her shoulders, and they looked at one another.

"I promise, I will. So long," she laughed to both of them.

"Farewell," said Martha.

"Auf wiedersehen," Castle said.

"Goodbye," Alexis finished, wiping a tear away and turning to walk through the gate.

Castle and Martha held hands.

"Mother, is it too late for me to buy a ticket?"

"Darling - "

"Ooh, I could hide in one of the bags."

"Sadly, I don't think you'd fit."

"Oh, too bad. I guess I'll just have to let her go."

"Oh, Richard; I know, I know. It's hard for me to watch her leave, too. But you're doing the right thing, Kiddo."

"I know,' Castle said, hugging her. "If you love someone, let them be free."

* * *

"Kate, I'm home," Castle called out. "Just dropped off Alexis. Mother's gone to a cocktail bar to drink her feelings. I could really use a hug right about now -"

He stopped in his tracks when he saw her sitting in the middle of his living-room. She had removed the chain from around her neck and placed it on the table. The ring he'd given her was now in the palm of her hand.

She looked up at him.

"Castle, I thought this was a great idea at first, but... it's just not working out."

Castle forced himself to keep breathing.  
"_Kate_? "

"The rings keep clinking together." She stood up and pulled out a simple, non-descript silver chain, slipping the ring on.

"Can you help me - again, please?"

Castle stared for a moment before shaking his head, pulling himself out of his reverie and putting the chain around her neck.

Beckett smiled, playing with the ring as she looked down at it.  
"Perfect. Oh, Castle, it looks so much better by itself, don't you think?"

'Yeah," he whispered. "What - um..." He cleared his throat. "What about your Mom's ring?"

She grinned.  
"That's why I kept it on its chain," she said, picking it up. "I thought you could wear it for me - you know, just until I can wear my engagement ring."

"That's... that's what you want? You want me to wear your mother's ring?"

"If you want to. I won't be offended if you don't; it would just mean a lot - "

He cut her off with a searing kiss.

"So I'll take that as a yes?" she said, gasping when he finally let her up for air, his hands still cupping her face.

"I would be honoured," he said, planting another kiss on her lips.

She smiled, picked up the chain and put it around his neck. He turned back to her.

"Oh, that looks good on you," she whispered.

"Kate, I don't know what to say."

"The phrase 'I love you' works."

"I love you, I love you I love you!"

"I love you, too," she said, laughing, her hand in his hair. They kissed again, this time softer and slower, until Castle lifted her into his arms and carried her towards the bedroom.

* * *

_Ten Days Later_

The room was lit only by candles, which gave it a rich glow. Joining them on the table was a vase of flowers and a spectacular feast. Romantic music filled the air. The hostess was dressed in a sexy black dress, her hair up, not a strand out of place, her make-up perfect, as she lay on the floor with a bullet through her chest, staring, unseeing, at the ceiling.


	12. Therapy

**_Disclaimer: I have no rights._**

**_WC: 732_**

* * *

Beckett knocked on the bathroom door.

'I'll be out soon!" Castle called out over the water of the shower.

"Oh, that's a shame," Beckett said, as she walked through the door wearing nothing but a towel. "I was just about to join you."

Castle turned, opened the glass door and peered out, staring as the towel dropped to the ground.

"Is there any way I could convince you to stay in a little longer?"

"Uh - I suppose if you presented a well-reasoned argument -"

She raised her eyebrows, smiling.

"Oh, God just get in here; get in here now."

Her phone rang.

"Damn it!

* * *

"Castle!" Ryan said in the victim's apartment. "Where's Beckett?"

"I ran ahead of her. I thought we could talk about maybe organising something special for Beckett's last case."

"Um, Castle, do you think we could discuss this at a better time?" Ryan asked.

"When would be a better time?"

"Beckett!" Lanie said.

Castle turned.  
"Hey! How did you get up so quick?"

"You're not exactly Usain Bolt, Castle. Why the rush, any way?

"You know, it's our last case; I wanted to see what it would be. It's a momentous occasion."

"You look disappointed," Beckett said.

"Well, I am a little. I was hoping for something a little more exciting."

"A murder's a murder, Castle. It's just as worthy of being solved as any other."

"I know."

"This woman had a life. She had a name – what was that, by the way?"

"Jillian Winters," Lanie informed Castle and Beckett as they stood, inspecting the victim'sremains. "Bullet wound to the chest, shot at close range, no other signs of injury. I'll have to get her back to the morgue to be sure, though."

"Her boyfriend, Billy Pollard, found her at 9:30 pm. He's at the precinct now."

Castle narrowed his eyebrows as he watched Ryan speaking to a young man.  
"If her boyfriend's at the precinct, then who's that?"

"Her fiancé," Esposito said.

Castle's jaw dropped.

"There you go, Castle. A twist. Is that exciting enough?"

"It's promising."  
He stared at her.

"What?"

"Last case."

She smiled back and sighed.

"I know."

"You and me. End of an era."

"I'm gonna miss it , too, Castle."

* * *

"We were all friends," Billy told Becket in the interrogation room. "I mean, Jack - Jack's great, he's my best friend and I never thought I would do that to a friend but... he works late a lot; Jill felt like there was this distance between them, even when they were together; and there was just this... electricity between the two of us; a connection. Jack wasn't supposed to be back until late. We had a romantic dinner planned and I came in, heard the music, saw the candles..." his voice cracked. "And there she was. I thought she was just unconscious till I saw the hole in her dress. It was so small but... the blood..."

Beckett handed him a tissue.

"Thank you."

"Mr. Pollard, I'm going to have to ask you what you were doing between seven and nine o'clock this evening."

"I was working. We have surveillance cameras and a sign-in sheet."

"I'll be sure to check into that."

* * *

"I knew; I found out yesterday. I saw texts on her phone. I was going to talk about it with her tonight. I wasn't angry. We were both keeping secrets."

"Bill said you working but your boss said your shift ended at six."

"That's because I lied to Jill. I was at Therapy."

"Doctor's name?" Beckett asked.

"No, I wasn't _in _therapy. I was _at_ Therapy. It's a nightclub in Hell's Kitchen."

"Isn't that a … gay bar?" Castle asked.

Beckett raised her eyebrows at Castle.

"Yeah. Yeah. So, you see, I wasn't mad at all. Finding out about the two of them… it was a relief. It just made me realise that this relationship was something neither of us wanted."

"We're going to obtain a warrant to search your apartment."

"You don't need a warrant, Detective. Feel free to search my place. I have nothing to hide."

"Billy said you two are best friends."

"Well, Billy's great and everything - you know, other than the whole deceit part - but it's always been Jill. She was my best friend. And... I feel horrible that I couldn't just tell her who I am. And now I'll never be able to."


	13. Don't Trust the World

**Disclaimer: I have no rights.**

**WC: 900**

* * *

"Body temp indicates she died between seven and eight," Lanie informed Beckett and Castle when they met with her at the morgue.

"She got off work at seven," Beckett said. "She lives about fifteen minutes away. If we add the time of getting ready and the preparation involved, that gives us an approximate twenty-minute window. Thanks, Lanie."

"No problem."

Beckett turned to Castle.

"What?"

"How did you know Therapy was a gay bar?"

"Oh, I've been there."

"What, for research?"

"Research? No, Black Pawn would never let me write about a gay bar. You know, Raley and Ochoa were supposed to be gay…"

Lanie snorted.  
"I wonder how Kevin and Javi would have felt about that."

"They are open-minded, modern guys. I'm sure they would have been fine with it."

Lanie and Beckett raised their eyebrows.

He chuckled.  
"Yeah, can you imagine their faces? That would have been awesome." He sighed. "Unfortunately, I work for a bunch of homophobes. Oh, well."

"So… gay bar."

"What? A straight man can't hang out with his gay friends on the weekend? I'm even thinking of taking Alexis when she turns twenty-one. She can dance, hang out with as many guys as she wants and I'll be completely cool with it."

"Because you know they wouldn't try anything," Beckett said.

"Exactly. I love the gays."

"Well, that makes two of us," Lanie said.

* * *

"Both alibis have been confirmed," Esposito informed them when they returned to the precinct. "Pollard was working until nine. We have time-stamped tapes and his co-workers back it up along with the time-sheet."

"And Jack?" Beckett asked.

Esposito cleared his throat.

"Ryan and I spoke to several young men who corroborated his story, including the bartender. They all said he left at eight-forty five.'

"Nice guys."

"Did you have anything to drink? They have really great scotch there."

"We were on duty, Castle," Esposito said.

"I might bring Jenny sometime. Seemed like a nice place," Ryan said.

Esposito stared tat them.

"What?" they both said in unison.

* * *

"I found traces of moisture on the victim's skin. At first I thought it was condensation but the conditions of her apartment conflict with that; and I've been overlooking my report; there was an unusually high temperature in certain parts of her body.  
"She was iced down," Beckett said.

"Which means my time of death is completely off."

"So, Billy or Jack could still be involved," Castle said.

"Or both," Beckett said.

* * *

Castle was staring at his phone as he sat next to Beckett's desk when she brought him a coffee.

"Waiting for Alexis to call?"

"She's not supposed to for an hour. I'm willing time to speed up."

"Is it working?

"It's kind of having the reverse effect."

Beckett sighed as she sat next to him, covering his hand with her own.

"Castle, I can't imagine what it must be like to have to try to be ok with her being so far away for the first time since…"

He sighed.  
"I have to let her face her fears – I'm just not so crazy about facing my own."

"I'm sorry."

"She's in very safe hands in a controlled environment. She's probably going to be completely fine."

"Probably."

He sighed.  
"It's the probably part that kills me."

"There are no guarantees Castle."

"And usually, I'm totally Zen about that; that's part of what's exciting about life. But when it comes to Alexis… I wish I could have some sort of guarantee that she was always going to be ok. Instead I just have to have faith."

"That's not something you usually have much trouble with."

"I didn't used to. I just don't trust the world any more, Kate. I was wary, I worried like any parent – maybe I got a little overprotective sometimes, but I still thought the world was so beautiful. I wanted to show it to her; and I wanted her to find it for herself too. I still think she needs to; in fact probably even more so now, but…"  
He fought back tears.

"Oh, Castle," she whispered, leaning forward.

"So we re-searched the apartment." Esposito informed Castle and Beckett as he and Ryan approached.

Beckett slowly withdrew her hand and Castle pulled himself together.

"I thought it was clean," Beckett said.

"Because we were looking for the wrong things. We found these in the trash," Ryan said, handing Beckett an evidence bag with a ripped up picture in it and another containing a Receipt.

"That receipt's for a bag of ice and it fits into our new window,' Esposito said.

"Yeah, but because the temperature was messed with, it's a big window," Beckett said.

"Check out the picture," Ryan said.

It was a picture of Jack, Billy and Jill - or, they at least assumed it had been Jill.

"The Vic's face has been scratched out," Becket said.

"There's your motive," Esposito

"It's still circumstantial, guys Not enough to charge him."

"No, no what you need is a confession," Castle said.

"Murder weapon would be nice, too," Esposito said.

"Right, so you just need to break him and you've got both."

"Not as easy as it sounds, Castle," said Becket, "he's as cool as a cucumber."

"A guy who shoots his fiancé because he's infatuated with her lover isn't cool as a cucumber," Castle said. "Every character has a weakness; a sore spot, kryptonite. You've just got to find his."


	14. Oh, Captain, My Captain

**Disclaimer: If you don't sue me, I won't sue you.**

**WC: 1075**

* * *

"I didn't scratch her face out in that picture," Jack said after being brought back to the interrogation room. "I'm being set up."

"So, you weren't in love with Billy?" Becket

"Of course I wasn't. Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I'm going to fall in love with every male I happen to be close to."

"You _were_ close, though?"

"Yeah, we were."

"Not as close as you and Jill."

"I already told you that."

"I'm wondering why, though."

"Why what?"

"Why were you so close? I mean Billy volunteers at a soup-kitchen; he's getting a degree in social-work. Jill... she was sort of shallow, wasn't she?"

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"I don't even know why you were friends with her let alone engaged. She didn't treat you very well, did she?"

"She did. Shut up."

"She was cheating on you. She probably didn't even love you."

"She _did _love me."

"Did she? Then, why didn't she understand that Billy was yours when you explained it to her?"

"Because he wasn't mine! She didn't deserve what I did to her! I don't know...I wasn't me. She said, they were going to run away together and I just lost it!

His breathing slowly steadied and he looked up at her.

"It's over, isn't it?"

"I'm afraid it's just beginning for you, Jack. Where did you get the gun?"

"It was my dad's. I kept it behind the bookshelf."

"Where is it now?"

"Behind _Therapy_. I hid it at the bar."

* * *

"So, Jack shot Jill over Bill," Beckett said in the bullpen. "This is your kind of case, right, Espo? Simple, clean-cut."

"Yeah. But not yours. How do you feel about this being your last case?"

"I feel good that I brought one more killer to justice; closure to one more family - Billy, too."

Castle's phone rang.  
"Oh, it's Alexis. Excuse me.  
"Hey Sweetie."

_"Hey D- How- - you_?"

"Uh, Pumpkin, you're cutting out."

_"What - that - Dad? C- quite - you. Y- cutting -."_

"Alexis. Hello, Alexis!" The line went dead.

Esposito politely excused himself while Beckett went over to comfort him. Moments later, Castle got a text.  
"She's fine," Castle said. "Just bad reception. She doesn't want me to worry."

"Castle, are you sure you want to do this?"

"Do what?"

"Move to Washington with me. You know, leave Alexis at a time like this. I mean, if you want to wait we can work something out..."

"No, Kate no. That's - that's separate. I can be in a different city from Alexis. I'm going to worry about her either way. But Costa Rica is just so far away. Kate, I'm committed to you; I'm committed to this. We made this decision together and I stand by it."

"Are you sure?"

"_Yes."_

"Ok, well... go home. You know? Have a rest before come back with that surprise-going-away-party you're planning for me."

"How did you - ?''

"Pfft! Castle,_ please_."

He smiled.  
"Ok. But you have to act surprised."

* * *

Beckett knocked on the door.

"Come in, Detective Beckett."

Beckett smiled as she entered.  
"That may possibly be the last time anyone calls me that."

"And possibly the last time you're in this office," Gates said.

Beckett bowed her head. When she looked up, she was still smiling.  
"Yeah," she whispered. "I... have my fair share of memories in this room."

There was a pause.

Gates' hand drifted towards her drawer, stopped, and she withdrew it.

"I think he'd be very proud of you."

"Well, I hope so, Sir."

"I know I am."

"That means a lot, Sir."

"And I feel I should apologise for delaying your departure."

"Well that wasn't your fault, sir. That was a mix-up with paperwork."

"Actually, there was no mix-up, Detective. I just wasn't ready to watch you go."

"Sir..."

"I know, I know. I encouraged you to take the job. The whole time I was thinking about what you would gain. I didn't consider what I would be losing. What this precinct would be losing."

"Captain... I'm touched."

Gates looked up.  
"Did you just call me Captain?"

Beckett shrugged, smiling.  
"That's what you are, isn't it, Captain?"

* * *

"Mother, how do you do it?" Castle asked Martha back at the loft.

"Pull of this outfit? Well, I'm one-of-a-kind, Darling..."

"No, I mean... how did you... how did you cope all these years, watching me walk out that door knowing I was chasing after murders and terrorists and mob men?"

"I ask myself that question every day. I'm guessing this has something to do with Alexis."

"How do I not worry?"

"Well, that's impossible, Darling. No caring parent can ever turn that off. But ... knowing that you were happy; that you were doing something you were passionate about, something you believed in... That helped. Now, there is nothing Alexis loves more than to learn. She gets that from you. Being in Costa Rica is a magnificent opportunity for her to do just that. So, she's happy, Richard. And that's... everything."

"You know Mother; you can be pretty wise sometimes."

"And don't you forget it kiddo."  
She kissed him.

"You must feel better now I'm not shadowing the NYPD."

"Oh, no, Darling; I know you too well and there are an infinite amount of ways you can get yourself into trouble in Washington."

Castle smiled.

His phone rang.

"Oh, it's the Precinct. Thanks mother."

"Any time." She left the room as he answered.

"Hello."

"_Mr. Castle."_

"Captain Gates. That's so sweet. You wanted to wish me well on my last day. But I'm coming back so you'll have a chance to say goodbye in person."

"_Mr. Castle, are you planning a surprise party for Detective Beckett?"_

"Why, yes."

"_And tell me, were you also planning on informing me, the Captain of the Precinct where you plan to hold this party?"_

"Well... no, no I can't say I was. But you're totally invited."

_"Mr. Castle, in the last half hour I've had to send home a clown, a juggler, a magician and what appears to be half of Cirque de Soleil, all without letting Detective Beckett know what's going on."_

"Well, what's allowed? We have to do something to mark the end of her relationship with the NYPD."

"I will allow a simple cake and a pack of playing cards."

"Drinks?"

"Non-alcoholic."

"Music?"

"It's a police station, Mr. Castle."

Castle paused.

"Ok, sounds fair."

"See you tonight, Mr. Castle."


	15. The Secret Letter

**Disclaimer: I do this for the love of Castle. I would never try to hurt something I love.**

**WC: 1,611**

* * *

The party was fairly low-key. Ryan, Lanie (who had arrived late having just come from the morgue), Esposito, Beckett and Castle sat around the break-room table playing poker and reminiscing while staff occasionally popped in to grab a piece of cake and say their goodbyes to Castle and Beckett.

Lanie checked her watch.  
"Oh, I've got to be going."

"But you just got here!" Castle said.

"Yeah, but I got an early shift. Sorry. But I will see you off before the big move," she assured Beckett as she stood up.

Beckett stood up, too, and hugged her.

"Of course. And we'll go out to drinks before then," Beckett said.

"Ok, ok," Castle said, standing up to hug Lanie as well. "Well, I'll see you 'round."

"See you around, Castle. I really am happy for you."

Castle and Beckett shot her a look.

"Uh, the move; I'm happy for the move. I mean, I'm not happy you're leaving - er... good luck. Both of you."

"Thanks, Lanie," Beckett said, laughing.

"See ya, Kevin."

"Bye, Lanie.'

"Javi -"

"Yeah, catch ya," Javi said, getting up, kissing her on the cheek and walking past them.

"Uh, Espo -"

"'Zito -"

"No, uh...good luck; congratulations. I'm gonna... head down to the gym; get in a workout."

He left.

"Uh...I hate to do this, too, but my shift is over and I do like to get home as early as possible now that Jenny's - you know."

"Of course, of course," Castle said, as the two men patted each other on the back before Ryan hugged Beckett.

"Night, you two. We are sure gonna miss you around here. Just won't be the same."

"We're gonna miss this place too," Beckett said, before Ryan followed Lanie to the elevator.

"So," Beckett said, "should we...?"

"Kate."

"What?"

"Go after him."

She opened her mouth.

"It's ok. Come on. You don't wanna leave it like this."

She smiled.  
"You know me so well."

"Yes, I do."

"It's really annoying."

"Annoying, but lovable?"

"Yeah, sure; let's go with that."

"Meet you by the elevator."

She left.

"Mr. Castle?"

Castle turned to find Gates standing in the break-room doorway.

"Are you about to leave?"

"Yes, I'm just waiting for Kate."

"I wish you two the very best in Washington."

"Thank you."

"Now, Mr. Castle, you may take your Espresso Machine."

"Uh... that was a gift."

"It is against NYPD policy to accept gifts. This was always considered a loan. Now your time with the NYPD has ended, I'm afraid it's time to take it back."

"You want me to take it back?"

"Believe me, Mr. Castle; this hurts me more than it hurts you. This way, you and Detective Beckett get to keep it."

"But, Captain -"

"Victoria."

"Excuse me?"

"Now that you're no longer shadowing the NYPD, you may call me Victoria."

He beamed.  
"Vicky?"

She chuckled, and then stopped abruptly.  
"No. Victoria."

"Ok. Victoria - oh, what was I saying?"

"Something about the coffee machine?"

"Yeah, I think so - oh, yeah, I remember now. Captain - Victoria - you don't understand what it was like before this machine came along; the way the officers had to live; the old coffee, it was monkey urine combined with battery acid - "

"Well, as ghastly as that sounds, Mr. Castle, they managed before you showed up. They can manage after you leave."

"You're a tea drinker, aren't you?"

"No, Mr. Castle. That would be my mother-in-law. Believe me, it pains me to see that marvellous machine go but policy is policy and I've bent enough rules for you. This precinct could get into a lot of - pardon the pun - hot water. "

"Ok, ok," Castle said. "I'll take the machine."

"Thank you, Mr. Castle. And may I add, for someone with no training or common sense, you've done quite well here."

"Thank you, Victoria."

"Have a good night, Mr. Castle."

"Rick."

She smiled.  
"I'm afraid you'll always be 'Mr Castle' to me."

He smiled back as she retreated to her office.

"Yo, LT!" Castle called out. "Little help?"

* * *

Gates opened the drawer she had considered opening earlier when Beckett had been in her office and pulled out a three-page long hand-written letter. She stared at it for several long moments before sighing and returning it to the drawer.

* * *

Esposito was kick-boxing a punching bag when Beckett entered the gym.

"Like me to hold the bag for you?" she offered.

He shrugged, pausing to allow her to do so, before continuing.

He didn't hold back; and she held her own as he hit the bag at full-force. When he had punched and kicked his way to exhaustion, he finally stopped, grabbing a towel and wiping his forehead.

"Got it out of you system?"

Esposito shook his head, turning back to her.

"You think it's that simple?"

"Espo, this was not an easy decision for me, but I did what I felt was the right thing for my life, for my career."

"And on a professional level, I respect that, Beckett, I do. I'm trying to be ok with you leaving. I'm trying to be rational and mature but no matter how I look at it; it feels like you're walking out on us; on me. I've had your back from day one and now, what? You and Castle are gonna go off to Washington; turn your backs on your family? You gonna become a big-time agent? Gonna forget your small-time cop buddies?"

"You know it's not like that."

"I don't, actually. So why don't you tell me what it's like?"

"Family is a part of you. No matter where you go, no matter what you do. You, Kevin, Lanie, Roy - you'll be with me, and I'll be with you. It doesn't matter whether or not we're working together, or living in the same city."

"That sounds a little too spiritual for you, Beckett."

"It's not spiritual, it's emotional. I love you all so much. I'm taking a job; I'm not walking out on our friendship. Javi, you ever need me, just call and I'll be on the next plane. I've still got your back."

He stared at her.  
"Same here, Beckett."

"So, we're cool?"

"Yeah," he said, hugging her, "we're cool. I am gonna miss you so much, though."

"Same here, Espo."

* * *

When Beckett and Espo returned to the bullpen, they found castle sitting next to Beckett's desk getting a massage from LT.

"Oh, yeah, that feels so good.'

"Am I interrupting something?"

Castle leapt up when he heard her voice. There was a snapping sound and he groaned in pain, frozen in place, slightly hunched over.

"Castle!"  
Beckett rushed to his side. "What happened?"

"We were carrying the Espresso machine to his Ferrari –"

"Wait; why?"

"NYPD policy," Castle grunted.

Beckett nodded slowly.  
"No gifts. Ok, let's take him into the break-room."

They did so.

"Ok, come on sit back down, slowly; come on," she said as she and LT lowered him on to the couch.

"Thanks, Officer Scott; I'll handle it from here."

"You can call me Luke or LT, Detective."

"Only if you call me Kate."

"It was an honour to work with you, Kate."

"The feeling is mutual, LT."

"Castle," he said.

"My man," Castle said as they sheared a secret handshake, before LT went back to work.

Esposito, meanwhile, attempted to do the same, but couldn't help watching them through the blinds as Beckett massaged Castle's back, neck and shoulders, sitting next to him on the couch.

"Mm, I like your fingers much better."

"So, what happened?"

"LT's a little faster than me. I tripped over my feet, took the Espresso Machine with me."

Beckett sucked in a breath through her teeth.

"Don't worry; I'm pretty sure the Espresso machine's ok. I broke its fall when I landed on my back –"

"Well, as long as the Espresso Machine's ok. How's your knee?"

"Fine - well..."

"Let me see –" Beckett said, rolling up his trouser leg.

"Kate, people can see."

"I don't work here anymore Castle. Besides, we're not doing anything wrong; I'm just checking you out."

"Since when did you need an excuse to check me out?"

She fought off a smirk.  
"Ok," she said, kneading the flesh of his knee with her thumbs, "how does that feel?"

"Pretty good."

"No pain?"

"Mm, it is fading."

Beckett slowly bent and straightened his knee.

"Does that feel ok?"

"Feels fine."

"Ok, what about your back? You think you can stand up?"

"I'll try."

"Ok, slow, remember," Beckett said.

"Ok," he grunted as she helped him up.

"Ok?"

"Yeah, yeah, I think I'm still up to it."

"Up to what?'

He grinned.  
"You'll see."

She grinned and narrowed her eyes.  
"Is it dirty?"

"No, but I love that that's where your mind went."

"You got something planned, Castle? 'Cause I know about the clown and the juggler, the magician, the gymnasts –"

"Yes, I know; you were supposed to. Diversion tactics, Kate. Did you really think, as well as I know you, I would do something so gaudy and over-the-top?"

"As well as I know_ you_? Yeah."

"Well, I admit that Jacques may have been part of my original plan but I soon came to my senses."

"Jacques?"

"He's a contortionist. Ok, good to go?"

"Just got to grab my stuff."

"Ok, I really will meet you at the elevator, I promise."

"No more heavy lifting."

"I feel so old; I used to be able to single-handedly carry a keg up the stairs without breaking a sweat."

"Maybe things like that have taken their toll on you, Castle."

"Hmm, maybe you're right."


	16. What Makes a Home?

**WC: 824**

* * *

"Ok, got my stuff," Beckett said.

"Wait," Esposito said. "I haven't said goodbye to my Man Castle yet."

"Zito."

"Castle. Good luck, bro," he said, giving him a man-hug.

"Oh, careful, careful."

"Sorry."He shook his hand. "Gonna miss you Rick."

"I'm gonna miss you, too, Javi." They smiled at each other and Esposito went back to his desk.

Beckett pressed the button.

"You know, now that you're no longer a detective and I'm no longer your shadow, we can make out in front of everyone without you or Gates getting in trouble."

"Oh, Castle, you may not be following me at work anymore, but you'll always be my shadow."

The doors opened.

"Always," he agreed as they boarded.

Looking into his eyes, she dropped the box containing her things and kissed him passionately as the doors closed on the bull-pen and their old lives.

Music started to play. At first she thought it might be in her head, but then she realised it was coming from the elevator, which stalled.

"Don't worry, that was supposed to happen," Castle said.

As the piano was joined by an unmistakeable Saxophone, Beckett gasped.  
"Castle, is that - ?"

"The one and only," he said, grinning.

"How did you get them to do this? You know you can't bribe anyone employed by the NYPD; it's a criminal offence."

"I didn't have to bribe them. Let's just say they were in a... _Sentimental Mood."_

Beckett beamed.  
"I see what you did there," she whispered as he pulled her into his arms and they danced. When the music eventually stopped, they stepped off the elevator, ready to start their new life together.

* * *

_Eleven Days Later_

He was still wearing his blue and white University of New York jersey. His brown skin was stained with blood and bruises as his body hung upside down through the hoop of his own School's court.

* * *

Castle sat at the table reading the newspaper as Beckett frantically got ready around him.

"Hey, Kate, check this one out."

"Sorry, Castle, no time."

"Sweetheart, your plane doesn't leave for four hours."

"The airport recommends getting there two hours early."

"So you have at least an hour," he said, gently grabbing her arm and pulling her down to his lap. "Come on," he said against the skin of her neck," have some breakfast with me and look at apartments. I specifically subscribed to the Washington Post for this very purpose."

"Could have just looked it up on the net."

"Sometimes I prefer doing things the old-fashioned way. More romantic."

She shook her head, smiling.  
"It doesn't matter where we live, as long as it's inhabitable, safe and close enough to my work."

He smiled.  
"Well, I personally think the place where we plan to start our life together is pretty important."

"Bricks and mortar don't make a home, Castle. It's the people within the walls that do that. Wherever you are is home to me."

"Wow. That is really quixotic. Can I steal that?"

"Since when did you need permission?"

"I don't. I'll probably use it either way. I'd like your blessing, though."

"That what you said to my Dad?"

He shrugged.  
"Pretty much - apart from the using part."

"Of course; I'm definitely the one using you," she said, reaching beneath his shirt.

He sighed softly.

"Oh, Detective; you don't want to miss your flight on your first day of training."

She groaned.

"Then you shouldn't tempt me... _Tempter_. Huh."

"Doesn't sound as sexy as temptress, does it?"

"No, it really doesn't." She sighed and pushed herself off his lap, her hand staying in its place as she stood behind him and kissed him on the cheek. "See you tonight."

* * *

Cooper Henry straightened his collar and took a deep breath before knocking on the Captain's door.

"Come in."

"Ma'am; Detective Cooper Henry reporting for duty."

"If you see my mother you can call her Ma'am. Call me Sir or Captain."

"Yes, Captain."

She arched an eyebrow.

"Captain?"

"Are you going to take a seat?"

"Right, yeah, right," he said, rushing to sit down in front of her.

"I've heard only good things from your Captain in New Jersey."

"Well, I'm honoured, Captain."

"You were transferred very soon after making Detective. Your file cites personal reasons. May I enquire as to what those reasons are, if it's not too personal?"

"No, Captain, it's fine. Um, my Grandmother is sick; I'm the closest family she has and she won't leave the home she shared with my Grandfather."

"Well, that's very noble of you."

"Well, it's family, Captain."

Gates put her hands together and studied him.

"Detective Henry, I think you'll fit in very well here."

Henry sighed and smiled.  
"Thank you, Sir."

She stared at him.

"Well? What are you waiting for? You are officially on the clock."

"Yes, Captain," he said, standing up, almost knocking his chair over.

Gates inclined her head.

"Sorry, Captain."

"Report to Detective Ryan."


	17. The Clock is Ticking

**WC: 787**

* * *

Ryan and Esposito noticed a young man hanging around their desks.

"May we help you?" Ryan asked.

"Is one of you Detective Ryan?" the young man asked.

"That's me."

"Cooper Henry. I just transferred from Trenton PD, homicide division. Captain Gates told me to report to you."

"Oh," Ryan said. "Why?"

"I'm the new member of your team."

"_My _team?"

"Bro, it's cool," Esposito said. "You know, Beckett's gone. Obviously, someone needs to lead the team."

"Well, why didn't Gates tell me herself?"

'"Because she s probably too busy running the precinct. There are over a thousand personnel here; you can't expect her to give an induction ceremony every time someone leaves an opening. It's not like it's an official title. We're still the same rank."

"_O_..._ K_. Henry, is it? How long have you been a Detective?"

"Uh... about a month."

"A _month._ And how many cases have you handled in that time?"

"Well... none."

"None?"

"My Grandmother got sick; that's why I transferred."

Esosito folded his arms.  
"Great, so we're down two people and on top of that we have to babysit Skippy here?"

"_Skippy_?"

"Ryan, Esposito, Cooper," Gates said, approaching them. "There's been a murder at New York University."

"On it," Ryan said.

"Buck up, Skippy," Esposito said. "Get ready for your first murder case."

"Why do you keep calling me _Skippy_?"

* * *

Before they entered the court, Ryan stopped them.

"Now, have you been to a crime-scene before?" he asked Henry.

"As a uniform, yeah, plenty of times," Henry replied.

"So you've seen dead bodies?"

"Yeah."

"Can you handle it?"

"Well it's not easy but of course, yeah."

"Have you ever seen something really messed up?" Esposito asked.

"Aren't all murders messed up?"

"I mean freaky stuff; the kind that makes you wanna drop your oatmeal from the attic."

"Hey, Esposoito," Ryan said, "easy on the kid, ok? What my partner means to say is... my predecessor, Detective Beckett, liked to take on more unusual cases. We as a team became quite good at solving those kind of cases; weird cases, and over time we earned a reputation. So, the scenes we get assigned to are often pretty hairy."

"Sometimes literally," Esposito said.

"I think I can handle it."

"You sure?" Ryan asked.

"I have a paper-bag in my pocket if you need something to throw up in," Esposito said.

"I'll be ok," Henry said.

"Ok. You ready?"

He nodded.

Ryan opened the doors to the gymnasium to reveal the crime scene. As he had feared, the scene caused distress to a certain detective but it wasn't Henry.

"What?!" Esposito cried as they approached the basketball hoop. "No! Not James Kent! He's our best player. Or... was, I guess."

Lanie was elevated on a large piece of machinery that allowed her to examine the body.

"My preliminary findings are that he was bashed to death and then placed in the hoop post-mortem," Lanie said.

"How did they get him up here?" Esposito asked.

Lanie shrugged.  
"That's your job. Hey, who's the new guy?"

"Detective Henry Cooper, this is Dr. Lanie Parish, Medical Examiner. We work with her a lot."

"Nice to meet you," Cooper said.

"Mm-hmm," Lanie said, smiling.

Esposito stared at her.

"What?"

"Nothing," Esposito said.

"This is Beckett's replacement?"

"No, technically Ryan is Beckett's replacement," Esposito said.

"What?'

"Don't worry about it, Lanie," Ryan said.

* * *

Roselyn Karpowski was interviewing the Custodian when they entered. She knew Beckett was done now and she'd supposed they would eventually bring in someone new but for some reason, she hadn't expected that person to be male, let alone so young. His suit was neatly pressed, though less expensive than Ryan's, and his brown hair was neatly cut. Intrigued, Karpowski returned to the interview, looking out for him at the corner of her eye.

* * *

Martha stood behind Castle, reading over his shoulder.

"What do you think?" Castle asked.

"Darling, shouldn't you be doing this with Katherine?"

"Kath - Kate's busy. I just want your opinion."

"Well as long as it has a spacious guest-room, that's alright with me."

"Right. You're right. For when Alexis wants to visit."

"Right, Alexis, of course. Make that two guest rooms - and a spare room if ever you wish to hear the pitter-patter of little feet."

"Mother, it's much too early to be talking like that."

"You're engaged, Darling. You need to plan ahead. And Katherine's nearing her mid-thirties, the clock is ticking..."

"Mother, don't... talk about my fiancé like she's a damn egg-timer."

"I mean no disrespect, Richard, but if you haven't discussed wanting children yet, now would be a very good time." She kissed him on the head and retreated back to her room as he stared after her.


	18. Somewhere Down the Line

**WC: 1,493**

* * *

"Karpowski, new guy; new guy, Karpowski," Esposito said when she approached them at the hoop.

"Cooper Henry," Henry said, holding out his hand. He was close enough now that she could make out the colour of his eyes: Aquamarine. The colour of the ocean.

_Snap out of it, Ros._

"How do you do?"

"Yeah, nice to meet you," Karpowski said, ignoring his hand, which he slowly withdrew.

"So, what's the story?" Ryan asked.

"Well, the Night-Janitor sometimes lets players practice after-hours as long as they pack up afterwards."

"You tellin' me every player on the team knows how to get up there?" Espsoito asked.

"Not every player. Just the ones on this list he gave me- and the coach; two of the assistants. It's all there."

"Thanks, Karpowski," Ryan said.

* * *

"Hey, Sexy," Esposito said in the doorway of the lab.

"Hey, Javi," said Lanie. "Where's Kevin?"

"He's talkin' to his kid."

"What?"

"Yeah, Jenny's been calling him up 'round this time every day and pressing the phone to her belly."

"Well, that's cute; but their baby won't be able to hear him for at least another five weeks at the absolute earliest."

"You know what? I think they know that. This whole parenting thing, it makes people weird. Anyway," he said, hugging her from behind, "I just wanted to know if you had any plans tonight. I thought maybe we could do somethin'."

"I'm... actually not sure. I'll call you, let you know."

He kissed her on the cheek.  
"You do that."

He stepped away.

"Hey Lanie," Ryan said, entering. "We got a time of death?"

"Yes, based on de-comp I'm thinking between midnight and four this morning."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Esposito asked.

"You didn't ask. Plus, the way his bones were broken indicates he was already dead when he was placed in the hoop. I'm calling C.O.D massive internal bleeding caused by being severely beaten and kicked to death. "

* * *

"Hey, Tory," Esposito greeted the girl from NYPD Tech.

"Hey, Javi. Detective Ryan. What can I do for you?"

"Our victim received multiple threatening e-mails. Do you think you could trace the address to a computer?"

"For you? I can try. Give me an hour - and the address would be good too."

"Here you go," Javi said, handing her a piece of paper. "And here's our vic's e-mail address and his password."

"Great. Uh..." She dropped her voice. "You wanna maybe have dinner with me tonight?"

He raised his eyebrows.  
"Yeah." He cleared his throat and smiled. "Yeah. Sounds good."

"I'll text you with the details."

"Alright."

Ryan glared at him.

"What?" Esposito asked once she was out of earshot.

"I thought you asked Lanie out tonight."

"Lanie said she wasn't sure."

"She also said she'd call you."

"Man, don't be listenin' in on my private conversations. If she calls, I'll cancel with Tory."

"That's a little unfair to Tory, isn't it?"

"Man, Tory knows Lanie and I have an arrangement and she's cool with it."

"And what exactly is this arrangement?"

"Simple; we're dating but we're not exclusive."

"And Lanie's ok with this?"

"It was Lanie's idea. She wanted to take things slow."

"Well, taking things slow is one thing. Seeing other people, though..."

"What are you talkin' about? You and Jenny weren't exclusive when you got together."

"That was just for the first few months"

"Well, it's only been a few months for us."

"No, you two have a history; that's different."

"Whatever, bro. This is between Lanie and me."

"You have any idea how you sound right now?"

Esposito stepped closer.  
"Kev, you're my friend and I appreciate your concern; but please, let me handle it."

* * *

Castle was pouring two glasses of wine when she entered. He'd dimmed the lights and music was playing softly in the background.

"Hey!" Castle said, moving to her side, handing her a glass and kissing her on the cheek.

"Hey. What is all this?"

"What? Did you think just because we're not working together anymore that was the end of our ritual?"

He led her to the couch and she leant back against him as they sipped their wine.

"So, how was your day?"

"I felt like it was my first day at the Academy. I'm thirty-four years old and it's like I have to re-learn everything from scratch. I just felt completely out of my element."

"Well, that's what the training's about, right? Getting you into your element."

"Right." She paused. "I'm glad you're coming with me. I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't come home to you every night."

Castle put his glass on the coffee table and ran a hand through her hair, his eyes on hers, smiling.

"You and me, we're a team. Where you go, I go."

Beckett smiled, taking another sip before straightening up, putting the glass back on the table and resting back into his arms.

"So," she whispered, "how'd you go today?"

"I basically just looked at places for us to live."

"Right, yeah. What did you come up with?"

"Well, I think we need to find a five-bedroom or a four-bedroom with a den."

She narrowed her eyes.  
"Why do we need so many bedrooms?"

"I need a study or office - if it has an extra living space we could use that. I just need a quiet place separate from our bedroom to write."

"That makes sense."

"And obviously, we need the Master bedroom for ourselves; one guest bedroom each for mother and Alexis to stay in -"

"Why can't they share?'

"What if Mother brought home a gentleman caller?"

"That would be very understanding of you. to accomodate her."

"Well, she's a grown woman."

"What if Alexis - ?"

"Kate, please don't."

"She's nineteen, Castle.'

"I know, I know; and if I know the guy and she's safe - ugh, do I really have to think about that right now?"

"No," she said, nuzzling his neck. "What about the extra room?"

He stiffened.

"Castle."

"Um, well, I was thinking we should have a spare just in case."

"Just in case what? We'll already have two guest-rooms."

"What if we decide to have a... room-mate?"

"A room-mate? Why would a married couple, one of whom is a millionaire, need a room-mate?"

"It would be fun?"

"Fun?"

"Yeah, you know, we'd never get bored with a room-mate."

"Ah."

"What? What's '_ah'_?"

"Castle, I understand. We're moving to a new city; you don't know a lot of people there, with me going off to work every day, you think you're gonna get lonely."

"No - well, yes, but - "

"That's why I think maybe we shouldn't move just yet."

"What? Where is this coming from?"

"It's been bugging me ever since we decided to go together. Castle, I know you. You're a people person."

"I'm a writer. I don't need to be around people all the time."

"Maybe not all the time but I'm gonnna be working long, unpredictable hours and you're gonna be all by yourself until I get home."

"What happened to 'I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't come home to you every night'?"

"I can commute; it's only an hour flight."

"Kate, every day?"

She shrugged.  
"For you? Sure. I kept ridiculous hours any way."

"Aren't you supposed to be on-call?"

"I'll work something out," she said, her hand on his knee.

"No. No, Kate, don't jeopardise your career for me. I do have some friends in Washington and I'll make some more. I'm good at that. Even if we did stay in New York, I would still be thinking about getting a room-mate."

"Why?"

He shrugged.  
"Because... I had a room-mate for eighteen years and they were the best eighteen years of my life and... I think about sharing a roommate with you, and I really like the idea. I don't have to have another room-mate but I'd like us to have the option if we ever do decide to have one."

Beckett took a deep breath and sighed.  
"_Oh_. A _room-mate_."

"Kate, don't freak out."

"I'm not. I didn't even know if you'd... want another '_room-mate'_."

"Yeah, yeah I could see myself wanting a new room-mate - not that I would love the old room-mate any less.'

"I've always wanted a room-mate."

"Really?"

"Yeah, one day. But I put my career first and I never really found a guy I could picture myself sharing a room-mate with. But then you came along and... I'd love to have a room-mate with you, Castle."

"Really?"

She smiled.  
"Yeah. Eventually. So, let's get that extra room. We might need it somewhere down the line."

He tried to suppress a grin and kissed her. Suddenly, he broke off.  
"You get that 'room-mate' is a metaphor for 'kid', right?"

"Yeah, somehow, I managed to crack that intricate code."

"Long as we're on the same page."

They smiled at each other as their lips and hands rejoined.


	19. Only Yours

**WC: 988**

* * *

Lanie held a wine bottle under one arm and a dish of food wrapped in al-foil in the other hand as she knocked on Esposito's door.

"Lanie!" he exclaimed when he saw her. "What – what are you doing here?"

"I came to surprise you!"

"Oh, I'm surprised."

"Aren't you going to invite me in?"

Esposito peered furtively behind him.  
"Uh…"

"Wait, do you have someone in there?"

"Well…"

"Oh, my God! What- Javier Esposito, you –"

"Hey, watch it; there are kids in this building."

She huffed in frustration.  
"You asked me to dinner–"

"And you said no."

"I said I'd call you."

"And you didn't."

"You invite someone to something and they don't say 'no', you keep the evening open. It's called manners."

"Manners? What do you call showin' up here unannounced –?"

"I was invited and I thought you would be happy to see me."

"You didn't RSVP!"

"It's not a birthday party, Javi; it's dinner."

Javi sighed and stepped out into the hallway, closing the door behind him and speaking in hushed tones.  
_"Look, you're the one who wanted to see other people, not me. If it were up to me it would be just us; no one else. I'm just going by your terms."_

"Yeah, see other people, that's fine, but I shouldn't be blind-sided like this!'

"_If you had called –"_

"What, I can't be spontaneous? Maybe in the future we should let each other know when we're with other people to avoid stuff like this."

_"No, I don't want to know about you and other guys."_

"Oh, ok, so you were protecting my feelings."

"_Yeah!"_

"Well, nice job!"

Esposito stood nearer to her, close enough to touch, his breath warm on her face.

"Lanie," he said, "if you said right now you wanted us to be us again – no one else, just us – I'd send her home in a heartbeat. There'd be no hard feelings. She's not looking for something serious. I am – just not with her. Say the word and I'm all yours. Only yours."

There was silence as they stared at each other, punctuated only by their own breathing. After a few moments, Lanie pulled away from his gaze.

"I can't, Javi," she said quietly. "I'm sorry. I'm not ready. You're right. It's not my place. You can do whatever you want, and you don't need my approval " She handed him the food. "Here, I made this for you; you might as well enjoy it. I hope you don't mind if I keep the wine."

She reached up to kiss him on the cheek, fighting back a single tear that threatened to break free.

Esposito took a deep breath as he watched her leave.

* * *

The next day, Castle sat on the couch, staring at the phone for several minutes before sighing and dialling.

_"Hey, Dad!"_ Alexis answered.

"Hey, Sweetie."

_"I've got a trail-walk in ten minutes so I can't talk long."_

"I'll only be a minute; I just wanted your input on something."

_"Ok, shoot."_

He took a deep breath and sighed.  
"Ok. Ok, here it is. I'm – Kate and I are talking about what kind of place we wanted to live in, how many bedrooms; and we were wondering if – if you'd like – once in a while that is – to stay with us."

"_Oh. Oh, well, if it's ok with Beckett then… yeah, yeah, I'd love to. Christmas… and semester break; that'd be great!"_

"Ok, awesome! Uh, and if you wanted to bring someone, say a friend or… Max., I would be totally fine with that."

_"Really?"_

"Yeah," he said, his voice high-pitched. He cleared his throat. "I mean, I'd try my best to be. You're a young woman now, Alexis, and I get that people your age are – "

"_Ok, ok, Dad. It's cool; thanks."_

"So…"

_"I've really got to be going, so, um..."_

"Love you."

"_Uh, yeah, love you, too."_

When she hung up, he collapsed on the couch, groaning.

* * *

"Hey Javi," Tory said when Esposito entered the room. "I heard you solved your case."

"Yeah, and it was all thanks to you. Patrick Tames, the guy you tracked, led a hate campaign against the vic for choosing an interstate team for after college. We've arrested all four men. They were basketball fans; none students."

"So how did they get him up there?"

"They didn't. They beat him up at a party and left him to die. A few of his buddies from the team were quite heavily intoxicated, thought he was passed out, thought it would be funny."

"Didn't they break his bones?"

"Some people don't know their own strength."

They smiled at each other.

"Listen - "

"Javi, you don't have to apologise again. I get it."

"No, no, I just... wanted to make sure we were cool."

"I'm cool if you're cool. Maybe from now on we should have some kind of roster or something."

"Yeah, maybe."

"I'm having a lot of fun with you, Javi. I don't intend to stop any time soon."

"Me, neither," Esposito said, smiling at her.

* * *

He was standing outside her building when she got there later that night.

"Javi," Lanie said.

"Hi."

"How long have you been waiting?"

"Just a couple hours. I wasn't sure when you'd be off work."

"Javi, it's ok. We don't have to -"

"I just... want to know if it's over."

She stared at him for several moments.

"It's not over," she said. "I mean, I don't want it to be over."

"Neither do I."

"I know I haven't been fair to you, Javi. I mean, you were right; you didn't ask for this situation."

"But I did agree to it."

"And we can still see each other?"

He took her hand in his.  
"I hope so."

She smiled.  
"Do you -" She took a deep breath. "Do you wanna come up?"

"Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I'd like that a lot."


	20. Feelings and Emotions

**Word-Count: 794**

He lay underneath the bicycle, sandwiched between the school-bus and the road, motionless, his own blood streaming down his face.

* * *

Castle and Beckett were packing up her things in boxes at her apartment.

"Castle, is all of this gonna fit at the loft?"

"Please. Have you seen my place? Besides, we can put some things in storage. We just need a temporary home for it until we find The Place."

"It's not some mythical realm, Castle; we just need somewhere to eat, sleep and poop."

"Poop? Really?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. We also need a place to fu -"

"Ok, ok I get the idea."

She grinned.

"Kate, wherever we choose to live is going to be our marital home; the place we grow old together, raise our hypothetical children."

"Castle, that's really nice but I don't see us spending the rest of our lives in DC."

"Oh, you don't?"

"No, this is just for work. I mean, the plan has always been to retire here. I guess if you want to we could talk about it but - "

"No, no. I - me, too. This city will always be my home, no matter where I go."

"I feel the same way - although DC is a slightly safer place to raise a family, so it's got that working for it. Still, Castle, we may move. We may only live in the house we choose now for a few years."

"Well, what if this weekend we find a place so perfect we never want to leave?"

"Castle, how many people find their dream home on their first try? Odds are it'll take us months."

"I thought you said it didn't matter."

"Well, obviously it does need to be close enough to my work; have enough bedrooms, be big enough for all our stuff."

"Well, I'm not bringing all my stuff. Mother can keep most of it at the loft; I don't mind."

"Even Boba?"

"No, Boba's coming with us"

She snorted.

Castle stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Either way, we'll get a great weekend out of it. Just you and me, five star hotel, hot tub, room-service..."

"Mmm, after all the training over the last couple weeks, that sounds good. Really good."

They kissed and he lifted her up onto a large box, his hands creeping beneath her shirt as she smiled against his lips.

* * *

Ryan was filling out paperwork when Henry approached him.

"Detective Ryan, can I ask you a personal question?"

"Well, Detective Henry, we don't really know each other that well - "

"Not about you; about Detective Karpowski."

"Karpowski? What do you want to know?"

"What's her deal; do you know? I didn't see a wedding ring; does she have a boyfriend?"

"No, not that I know of. Detective Karpowski sort of keeps to herself. Why do you ask? Are you...?" He smiled. "Are you interested?"

He shrugged smiling.  
"I don't know; maybe."

Ryan smiled, then suddenly became serious.  
"Well, you'd better not act on it. There's a strict NYPD policy about colleagues dating. You're both homicide so..."

"Right. Right."

"Hey, man, I'm sorry. But if it's any consolation, most of us around here are pretty sure she plays for the other team so you probably wouldn't have had a chance any way."

"Oh. Well... With all due respect sir, how is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Yeah, I don't know." His phone rang. "Hey, Lanie," he answered. There was a pause. "Ok. Ok, Esposito and I will cover it." He hung up. "Cooper, you can finish this, right?" he asked putting on his jacket.

"Uh, yeah."

"Great. Esposito!"

"Yeah," Esposito said, stopping as he walked by.

"Lanie's got a suspicious body she wants us to take a look at."

"Cool."

"Yeah, so..." Henry said as they left, "I guess I'll just... take care of the... paperwork. Awesome."

* * *

"So how was the movie last night?" Ryan asked as they walked through the parking lot to the morgue.

"Movie? Oh yeah, the _Movie_ was great." He winked.

"Do you and Tory ever just hang out? Talk?"

"What would be the point? I got Lanie for that. With Tory, it's just sex."

"Man I don't know how you do that."

"What?"

"Separate the sex from the emotion."

"I'm a guy. We don't automatically equate emotions with sex."

"Not after a one-night stand, no, but if you're physically intimate with someone on a regular bases, you're sharing an experience with them. I don't see how you can leave feelings completely out of it."

"Hey, I said there were no emotions. There are plenty of feelings. That's kind of the point."

Ryan's phone rang again.  
"Oh. it's Jenny. I gotta take this."

"Ok, man, I'll see you inside."


	21. Locking the Door

**Word-Count: 1209**

**A/N: The rating has changed to M; but this doesn't mean there will be lemons - probably some limes but nothing excessively graphic. I just noticed that some of the dialogue is getting a bit too sexually explicit for a T story in my opinion. It may not seem like much now but later Beckett has a monologue that is most definitely M. Also I fixed a continuity error in chapter nineteen; I forgot Alexis was in Costa Rica.  
Oops.**

* * *

Esposito and Lanie had their backs to the door when Ryan entered. Esposito was hugging her from behind.

"Javi," she said, giggling, "I'm working."

"Me, too," he said, nibbling her earlobe. "I missed you."

"Mmm, I missed you, too," she said, turning to kiss him. She froze when she saw Ryan and broke free of Esposito's arms. Esposito turned and, upon seeing his partner, cleared his throat.

"Hey, man; uh, how's Jenny?"

Ryan stepped forward.  
"Fine. She just... wanted to know if I'd shrunk her jeans in the wash. I guess she's starting to gain the pregnancy weight and she's feelin' a little self-conscious. So, Lanie; what you got for us?"

"Trenton Marcus. Sixteen. Run down by a school bus on his bike three days ago. The coroner already ruled it as an accident but the routine blood-work came back positive for unusually high levels of diazepam. Thought I'd give you guys a heads up just in case it was more than an accident."

* * *

"Hey, Henry. Yeah, once you've finished the paperwork, I want you to open up a new case file. Trenton Marcus. Yeah, we can do that when we get there. I appreciate the initiative but why don't we try baby-steps. Ok. Catch ya." He hung up.

"Skippy's eager isn't he?" Esposito said.

"Cut him some slack; he's new."

"I don't remember you being that green when you started with us."

"I had experience as a detective."

"Yeah, more experience than I realised."

Ryan smirked.  
"So, you and Lanie...things are goin' well?"

"Yeah. I think so."

"Have you talked about being exclusive yet?"

"Uh, no, not since the big fight."

"And you're ok with this arrangement; seeing two girls at once?"

"Are you kiddin' me? Man this is every guys dream."

"Not my dream. Is this really what you want, or is it just what you think you're supposed to want because you're a guy?"

"No. No, but I'm making the best of a bad situation. I mean, Lanie's off doing God knows what with God knows who. Being with Tory keeps my mind off it."

"So you're basically using her."

"What? No! _No_. No."

"You can keep saying it but it won't make it less true."

"I told you, Tory knows the deal."

"You sure about that? You know, Tory's a person; not a piece of meat."

"Hey, watch it."

"Look, man, I know it's not my business but do you even know anything about her other than how good she is in the sack?"

"Of course. I know she"s good with computers."

"I don't mean to come off all judgie but it seems a little disrespectful to me is all. I mean, why can't you wait for Lanie?"

"I _am_ waiting."

"And what are you gonna do when Lanie is ready? Throw Tory away like a used tissue? Chuck her in the trash once you've had a few good blows?"

"Kevin, you are out of line."

"Just callin' it as I see it."

* * *

"Starting a new case-file?" Karpowski inquired, stopping near Henry as he labelled a new folder.

"Yes. But I don't have any information other than his name. Detectives Ryan and Esposito are on the way back from the morgue."

"Don't take it personal, Henry; no one lets the new kid run with scissors."

"Run with scissors? Ryan had no problem giving me his paperwork to fill out. How is this any different?"

"This stuff is what we use to build a case for the DA. Get it wrong, criminals can go free and even innocent men can end up behind bars. Ryan and Espsoito will teach you."

"I know how to file." He sighed. "Sorry, I don't mean to take my frustration out on you."

She shrugged.  
"It's a frustrating job. You _are_ carrying on like a little bitch - "

"Hey!"

"Just wait 'til you're facing down serial killers and child molesters."

"I've done that. I've been a cop seven years."

"It's not the same." She stepped closer to him so they could hear each other's breathing. "When you're in that room, facin' down a perp and you know every little thing you do could change everything for his life, the victim's family, your career... it's not the same as responding to a call and holding your gun out to a stranger in dead of night. Not even close."

"Wow. I mean, thank you, Detective Karpowski. Um, can I... ask you a personal question?"

"No." She started to walk away. "See you later, Detective Henry."

"You can call me Cooper."

"And you can call me Detective Karpowski," she said over her shoulder.

He started to look down, but she threw him a slight smile, and his lip curled as he shook his head and continued his work.

* * *

"Ok, this is the last of it," Becket said as they brought a few more boxes out into the hallway. They stepped back into the empty apartment.

"So, that's... that, I guess," she said, looking around.

"Lot of great memories of this place," Castle said, putting his arm around her.

"Yeah," Beckett said, smiling as she looked at the floor.

Castle grinned as he looked over at the bathroom. They both grinned as they realised they were both staring at the kitchen

"Are you sure you don't want to sublet this place just in case we decide to - ? "

"We're getting married, Castle. If the job doesn't work out, the Loft makes the most sense for us to both live. I don't need my single-person's apartment anymore."

"You're sure?"

She stared deep into his eyes as she turned around to face him, her arms around his neck.  
"Positive." She pecked him on the lips before removing herself from his embrace and holding out her hand expectantly.

He sighed and took his spare key out of his pocket, handing it to her. She kept her hand outstretched and raised her eyebrows. He sighed again and reached into his shoe, pulling out another spare key. She grinned as he handed it to her.

"Ok," she said as they took one last look at the place.

"Everything's turned off?"

"Yep."

"Ok, I guess you can give those to the landlord and we can take the last of it to the van."

She nodded as she locked the door for the final time.

They smiled at each other as they took the boxes down the hallway.

"You know, that van I rented is pretty cool, maybe I should buy one for the big move - and future possible moves."

She shrugged.  
"It's your money, Castle."

"Pretty soon it'll be our money."

"Oh, we might be getting married but I'm more comfortable if we kept our own individual accounts."

"Hey, Kate, what's yours is mine."

"Castle, I can't share money with you."

"Why not?"

"Because you spend your money on light-sabres and property on the moon. And there's nothing wrong with that while it's your money and I don't want to control what you spend or fight with you about money or force you to be someone you're not when that little boy in you is part of what made me fall so hard for you. We're buying a house together; isn't that enough?"

He shrugged.  
"I guess."


	22. DeJaVu

**Word Count: 541**

* * *

Castle and Beckett stood by the door of the loft with their bags packed for the weekend and at their feet.

"Oh, Katherine, look after him, won't you? Make sure he stays out of trouble," Martha said, hugging her.

"Of course," Beckett said.

"We'll be back Sunday night, Mother," he said as she embraced him.

"Well, good luck in Washington. I hope you find your dream home."

"I do, too," Castle said, grinning at Beckett.

"Well," Beckett said, "any thing's possible."

* * *

Beckett bit her lip, a grin on her face as they found their seats in first class.

"What?" Castle asked as she sat next to the window.

Beckett shrugged, her gaze averted as her grin grew broader.

He sat down next to her.  
"What is it?"

Beckett looked at him, biting her lip again.  
"It's just... Deja-vu. You remember the last time we flew first-class together?"

He nodded.  
"Yeah."

"I was with someone else, Royce had just died, I'd nearly killed his murderer and you and I had almost..."

"Yeah. Wait, _did_ we almost?"

"Oh, we definitely almost."

"I wasn't imagining that?"

Beckett shook her head, still grinning.  
"No, you weren't. So, that flight back, I was sitting next to you, watching you sleep - "

"Creepy."

"I'm in love with you. Get over it."

He grinned.

" Any way, so, you were there..." She bit her lip yet again. "You were always just there, and I... I was thinking about all the things I couldn't do. Because the timing was wrong, because I was scared... But this time, we're... engaged and looking at houses and staying in the same room, in the same bed and..."

His face was a hair's breadth from hers.

"And?"

Beckett held on to his arm, snuggling up to him.

"And this time, I get to do this."  
She kissed him.

He smiled as he kissed her back.

* * *

"So, Mr. Castle," the gentleman at the hotel lobby desk said, "am I right in saying this will be your first time staying with us?"

"You would," Castle said.

"Well, I hope you and Miss Beckett enjoy your stay here at the Jefferson. Here is the key to your suite."

Castle accepted it.

"Thank you."

"George will help you with your bags and show you to your suite. The couple's massage is booked for seven."

"Thanks." He turned to Beckett. "I... is that ok?" Castle asked.

"Sounds awesome," Beckett said, grinning.

* * *

Castle tipped the bell-boy, who left the room.

"Well," Beckett said, looking around the large sutie, "more deja-vu."

Castle put his arms around her.

"Yes, but this time -"

Beckett sighed, pushing him up against the wall, promptly cutting him off.

"Oh, I'm gonna have you in every room in this suite," she said, kissing him.

"Hmm, sounds good," came his muffled reply.

"Mm, Castle," she said, unbuckling his belt, "maybe you should push that massage to tomorrow night. I think we're gonna be a little busy for the next few hours."

Castle panted against her skin.  
"_Yeah,_ definitely."


	23. If I Had a Pony

**Word Count: 901**

* * *

Beckett stared at the first house as they stepped out of their rental car.

"Uh, Castle, are you sure this is the right place?"

"Yeah, this is it." He pulled a picture of the house out of his pocket and gave it to her.

She blinked.  
"Uh, Castle, why didn't you show this to me earlier?"

He shrugged.  
"Must have slipped my mind."

"Yeah, sure."

A middle-aged woman greeted them on the front lawn.

"Mr. Castle? June Baylor, we spoke on the phone." They shook hands.

"Hey. How are you? This is my fiancé, Kate Beckett."

"How do you do?"

"Miss Beckett, it's a pleasure. Well, why don't I show you the place?"

"Sounds good," Castle said, nodding.

"Uh, yeah," Beckett said, staring up at the house as they walked up to the door which the realtor unlocked.

"So, here's the entrance hall."

_Entrance Hall_, Beckett mouthed to Castle.

_I know!_ Castle mouthed back.

"The house was designed by Italian architect Marco Vicenza, and you can see it reflected in the design. Here we have the general living area, complete with fireplace, great for entertaining guests. And here is the dining hall; obviously, you can change the layout as you see fit when you bring in your own things but as you can see, it's large enough for a table that seats thirty people comfortably."

"Uh, I don't know when we'll ever have thirty people over for dinner."

"Oh, come on, Kate, we'll be Washing-tonites. Washingtonians? Washers? Anyway, I have been known to throw some epic parties, and my dinner-parties are no exception. We can host as a married couple. Doesn't that sound awesome?"

"Uh, yeah, awesome," Beckett said.

"And here's the kitchen. Fully equipped, restaurant standard. Here is the Den, where you can come to just get away from it all; notice the colouring stands out from the rest of the house; more earthy tones. And here is the first floor bathroom. Any questions so far?"

"How many bedrooms? Beckett asked.

"Seven. There's also a guest-house in-between the tennis-court and the swimming pool out back."

Beckett nodded.  
"Huh."

* * *

"So, what did you think?" Castle asked as they got back into the car.

"Um... it's very nice."

"Nice? It's spectacular."

"Well, _yeah_, but... do we really need so much space?"

"You can never have too much space. Just think of the epic Laser Tag games! I could buy you a pony!"

"What would I do with a pony?"

"Ride it?"

"We agreed on five bedrooms."

"So, what difference do a couple extra rooms make?"

"It is eleven acres, Castle!"

"We can sell off some of the land if you're not comfortable with it. The house itself isn't that much bigger than my place in the Hamptons."

"But we're not talking about living in that place; it's just a Summer-Home. I mean, I don't know if I could feel at home in something that's practically as big as the White House."

"You're exaggerating. It's nowhere near as big as the White House - granted, it _is_ a white _house_ -"

"Ok, Castle, I guess I can keep an open mind but... let's just keep looking anyway, ok?"

"Well, yeah, it's only the first place!"

* * *

"Oh, it's beautiful," Beckett said.

Castle squinted.

"What's wrong?" Beckett asked.

"It looked bigger in the picture."

"Now that you mention it, it does look kind of small for a five-bedroom."

"Actually, it's a two-bedroom."

Beckett hit him.

"Ouch!

"Why would you take me to such a beautiful house if you know we can't get it?"

"Because I thought it was bigger and we could create the extra rooms ourselves."

"Well... it's worth a look."

"You can't be serious. Kate, we're talking about possibly starting a family one day. "He peered over the fence. "There's barely a backyard there."

"You and I both grew up in apartments and Alexis grew up in the loft."

"Any one of which could put this place to shame in the space department."

"Castle..." she put her head on his shoulder. "It wouldn't hurt to look. Please?"

Castle sighed.  
"I guess I don't see the harm in looking."

She grinned.

* * *

"Hey, sweetie," Castle said, answering his phone.

"_Dad, what's up with all the pictures of houses you sent me_?"

"Well, I figured you'd want a say in where Kate and I live seeing as you'll have your own room."

_"Oh, yeah. How _is_ the house-hunting going?"_

"Great. Um, we've taken a look at a couple of apartments but I think we both know it's going to be a house. Haven't felt that thing yet."

_"What thing?"_

"You know, that thing when you know, you just know... _this_ is the place."

_"Well, it's your first day of looking. It might take a while."_

"Yeah, Kate said the same thing. How's Costa Rica?"

_"Great, great, I've actually met a lot of awesome people here and I'm learning a lot."_

"Wait, wait - go back. You're meeting new people. What are their names?"

"_Relax, Dad, they're all safe."_

"How do you know?"

"_Because the Professor checked them all out before letting us hang out with them. Besides, we're not allowed to leave the hotel grounds without at least two of the chaperones and we're always in view of staff. I'm ok, Dad, I promise."_

"I miss you."

_"I miss you, too."_

"I can't wait 'til you get home."

"_Me neither. I love you."_

"Love you, too."


	24. Just Getting Started

**Word Count: 989**

* * *

Beckett yawned as Castle parked the car.

"Just one more place after this one; then, we'll go back to the hotel," Castle said.

"Long day," she said.

"Yeah. Look, maybe we'll find something next time."

"Hey, Castle, if you really liked the mansion -"

"No, Kate, that wasn't The One."

"How will we know when we've found The One?"

"I don't know," he said, shrugging as he turned to look at the house. "We'll just... know."

"What?" Beckett asked, following his gaze. _"Oh_."

"Yeah," Castle said.

"See something you like?" June asked as she greeted them.

"It's really nice," Castle said.

"Yeah, I like the colour," Beckett said.

"Some people find the bright blue an eyesore," June said.

"No, no it's..."

"Calming," Castle said.

Beckett smiled.  
"Yeah. Yeah and the rose garden..."

"Tire swing..."

"The fence," they both said in unison, grinning at each other afterward.

"Well," June said, "why don't we check out the inside?"

Castle grinned, snapping a picture of the exterior with his phone and sending it to his daughter.  
"Ok!"

* * *

"So, what did you think?" June asked them as they exited. "I know it needs a little fixing up and there is the termite problem -"

"I can get that all sorted out before we have to move in. Money is no object. "

"Well, it's in in a great school district and only ten minutes out of the city..."

"What do you think?" Castle asked.

"I think... we've found our home."

Castle bit his lip.  
"I agree."

"We did have one more place to look at..." said June.

"That won't be necessary. I just need to get the ok from my daughter, but once I do... I believe we have a deal."

"You're happy with the asking price?"

"Are you kidding? For this place? It's a steal. I'm tempted to offer to pay more. Is there anyone else interested? I'll double it. Triple."

June chuckled.  
"That won't be a problem, Mr. Castle. No one else has been prepared to deal with the termite problem or the massive bathroom renovations, let alone the repairs on the staircase; not to mention the electrical issues."

"Well, none of those people are best-selling authors."

"Ok, well, I'll send you the papers on Monday."

"Looking forward to it."

They all shook hands and the realtor left.

Castle got a text.

"It's Alexis." He grinned. "_Dad, if you don't buy that house, I will_."

He looked up.  
"Well, I guess that settles it."

"We're buying a house."

"We're buying a house."

They both laughed as he lifted her up in celebration.

"I've never lived in a house before," Beckett said as he put her down.

"Me neither," Castle said. "I mean, I own a house and I've slept in it but..."

"It's not the same," Beckett said.

"No, it's not."

"This is gonna be our home."

Castle nodded.  
"Our first house."

"In fact... I know what I said about New York but Castle... I could see myself growing old here? Does that sound crazy?"

"Yes, but the best kind of crazy."

* * *

"Tory, you wanted to show me something?" Esposito asked, stepping into NYPD's tech division.

"I pieced together a deleted document on Trenton's computer."

Esposito read the document on screen.

"Now, psychology is not my strong suit but it looks like - "

"A suicide note."

"So it's not just me?"

"I'm gonna need copies of that."

"Of course."

"Um... Tory, there's actually... something I would like to discuss with you that is not pertaining to the case."

She narrowed her eyebrows.  
"Ok."

He took a deep breath.  
"I've been having a lot of fun with you over the past few weeks but... I was thinkin' tonight maybe we could go out; maybe do something other than just eat and go back to my place. Spend some time together, get to know each other. No pressure. Just two friends hangin' out."

"Oh. I thought you were gonnna end whatever it is we have."

"No, no. I wanna know what we have. We have fun... but sometimes I feel like I'm using you."

"Oh, no, Javi - "

"I do like you, Tory. For more than just your body. Don't get me wrong, it's a slammin' body, but... I think I could like you a whole lot more."

"What about Lanie?"

He sighed.  
"Lanie's not my girlfriend any more. I thought she was but... she doesn't want that. I can see whoever I want. And I wanna see you."

"But I thought..."

"I can't wait for Lanie forever. Don't get me wrong, I like being a bachelor but... y'know, I wanna settle down eventually. With Lanie, I never know where I stand, and she's told me repeatedly she doesn't want the same things I do."

"Well, for the record, Detective Esposito," Tory said, inching closer to whisper in his ear, "I do. See you tonight."

* * *

"With the suicide note and the fact that it was Trenton's prescription, and there was no trace of anything else in his stomach, we're comfortable letting the coroner rule it as a suicide," Espostio told Gates.

"Well, that certainly is sad. Good work, everyone."

She left.

"Well, I have a date," Espo said, leaving.  
"And I have a pregnant wife, so..." Ryan went too.

"So, I guess they're leaving you to do the paperwork again?"

"I guess so. But you're right. I do have to pay my dues. Um... Detective Karpowski..."

"Ros."

"Huh?"

"After hours you can call me Ros."

He smiled.  
"Ok, Ros. You're not gay, are you?"

"Excuse me? Who told you that?"

"Detective Ryan says everyone thinks that.

"Well, just because I'm in law enforcement and I don't run around in heels doesn't -"

"I know. I've seen the way you've been looking at me."

"Don't flatter yourself."

"Don't try to deny it."

"You're too young, Skippy."

"You know, that nickname's getting old."

"Well... I'm just getting started."  
With a wink, she left.


	25. Game Over

**WC: 1,055**

At six foot two, with piercings through his eyebrow, lip and tongue, he looked a little out of place at the genealogy library - that and the fact that his throat had been slit and he was lying on the floor dead.

* * *

He woke up to an empty bed. Beckett walked in a few moments later carrying a breakfast tray. Castle stretched and rubbed his eyes as she sat the tray on his lap and kissed him.

"Morning," she whispered, a smile on her face as she sat beside him.

"Mm, morning. What's with the breakfast?"

"Most important meal of the day."

"What do you want?"

"I can't make my fiancé breakfast in bed?"

He arched his brow.

"Ok, I may have an ulterior motive."

"Ooh, I love when you have ulterior motives. Do you want me to perform sexual favours in exchange for food?"

She rolled her eyes. "Why would I do that when you're already willing to do it for free?"

"Ok. Then what is it?"

"I was thinking, with my Orientation and Alexis coming home, maybe now is a good time to talk about goin' public. As an engaged copule."

He raised his eyebrows, taking a sip of coffee and setting the tray down on the dresser.  
"Now?"

She nodded, kneeling as he pulled her closer.  
"We could invite the guys to the Old Haunt, tell 'em we're engaged, and then maybe... think about setting' a date, findin' a venue."

"Oh." He gasped. "_Oh."_

"Then, we can put an announcement in the paper, you know, like a regular couple. No tell-all interview, no fan-fare, just a nice picture of the two of us with a short paragraph tellin' the world we're gonna get married. What do you think?"

"I think that's a very, very good idea."

"Really?"

"Mm," he said, kissing her.

"You're breakfast will get cold."

"Mm, I don't care..."

She broke off and glared at him.  
"I put a lot of thought and effort into this meal."

"Can I multi-task?"

"I'll allow it."

"Really? You'll let me eat during sex?"

She shrugged and smirked.  
"As long as I get to be the plate."

His mouth fell open.  
"I love you."

* * *

"So," Esposito said as they examined the body, "you still on for tomorrow night?"

"Oh the dancing? Of course."

"I know you've had a pretty long week. You've worked a lot of hours."

"Exactly, so all I want to do at the end of a week like this is go out and have fun."

"You sure? You don't have to on my account."

She raised her head.  
"Is this about that girl from NYPD tech?"

"What? No! How do you know about her?"

"From what my sources tell me, you haven't exactly been discrete."

"Your sources?"

"Hey Javi, we have an arrangement. You can see whoever you want, and we agreed we didn't need to share details, but we also agreed to be honest -"

"I _am_ being honest. Is it so hard to believe that maybe I'm just lookin' out for you?"

"Well I don't need you to look out for me. So, tomorrow night at eight, you're gonna pick me up, take me dancin' and we're gonna have a good time whether you like it or not. Do you understand?"

"Fine!"

"Fine.'

"Uh..." Ryan said, as he and Henry approached, "Are we interrupting?"

Lanie and Esposito looked at each other than back at Ryan and Henry.

"No," Esposito said.

"Really? 'Cause..."

"Detective Esposito, why don't you fill in your colleagues?"

"Yes, of course. Thank you, Dr. Parish." He turned back to Ryan and Henry.

"Donald Hollinger, 17..."

"Did you say Donald Hollinger?" Ryan asked.

"That's what his ID says."

"As in... Anne Marie's boyfriend?"

Esposito and Lanie stared at him.

"Oh, come on!"

"_That Girl,_" Henry said.

"Thank you!"

"You two done with the slumber party chat? 'Cause we got a murder to solve," Esposito said. "Staff say they remember him comin' in yesterday afternoon to work on a biology project. Apparently he was supposed to be tracing which traits he inherited from whom."

"Whom? Castle would be proud."

"Who's Castle?" Henry asked.

There was a pause.

"Richard Castle," Lanie said.

"The author?"

"Mm-hmm."

"Wait. Wait, so Detective Beckett is... Kate Beckett? The inspiration for Nikki Heat? I work at the precinct Richard Castle was shadowing? That's..." he stopped smiling when he saw their stares and cleared his throat. "So, when was he found?"

""Eight o'clock this morning," Esposito said. "Staff found him like this. It must have happened yesterday and they left without knowing."

"How could they not have noticed a dead guy?" Henry asked." "I would have thought it'd be hard to miss."

"Well, he was behind one of the shelves here and it's a big place."

"Throat was slit from behind," Lanie said. "He bled out pretty quickly."

* * *

Tory and Esposito were playing video-games at his place.

"Yes! Esposito said. "Owned."

"It's not over yet," Tory said.

"Oh come on, I've practically drained you of all your energy points. The only way you could beat me now is if you had a ...no way! A sword of Nygon? How did I not notice that."

She decapitated him (in the game).

"Funny the things you miss when you're talking about yourself."

"No! No!"

She chuckled.

"Owned."

"Two out of three."

"Actually, um... could I talk to you about somethin'?

"Sure."

"Javi, are you still seeing Lanie? 'Cause Velasquez saw you two together the other day."

"Yeah. I thought you knew the drill."

"But... I thought you'd ended things with her, that you were ready to get serious with me."

"I said I wasn't gonna sit around and wait for her and I'm open to the possibility of being serious with you. I just still don't know..."

"Well, Javi... I thought... I thought we were like, dating now."

"We are - sort of."

"But you're still seeing Lanie."

"I thought you were cool with this."

"Back when it was just fun, yeah, but I've gotten to know you and... I really like you and I thought you liked me too."

"I do."

"You and Lanie have a history. I can't compete with that."

"It's not a competition."

"Javi, I never wanted to be _that_ girl, but... you're gonna have to choose. You can't have both of us."


	26. I Warned You

**Word Count: 636**

**Warning: The "N-word" is used in this chapter.**

"I warned you," Ryan said to Esposito back in the bull-pen.

"Don't gloat. It doesn't befit a family man such as you," Esposito said as Henry approached. "What you got for us, Skippy?" Esposito asked.

"Donald Hollinger comes from a family with a pretty large wrap; mostly in hate crimes with strong ties to the KKK," Henry said.

"Do you even know what the KKK is?" Esposito asked.

"I'm from Jersey, not Mars."

"Ignore him," Ryan said.

Esposito glared at him.

"His family lives upstate," Henry said. "He just moved here a month ago."

"There's something that doesn't make sense to me," Ryan said. "He said he was doing a project for school. But it's the middle of summer."

"So what was he really doing at a genealogy library?" Esposito asked.

* * *

"Hey, Javi," Lanie said as Esposito entered the morgue, taking off her gloves and reaching up to kiss him on the lips, which he deflected so she kissed his cheek instead. "I'm sorry about before."

"Don't sweat it."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Esposito said, averting her gaze and stepping back. "You said you wanted to show me something."

"Um..." She shook her head, looking at him from the corner of her eye. "Yeah. Did you notice these scars on his face and body?"

"Yeah, I figured he got into a lot of fights. I mean... racism isn't quite as popular as it used to be."

"That's what I thought at first, too. But these scars weren't made by cuts, they were made by burns."

"Burns? But they're so...straight; neat."

"In my opinion, he's undergone laser tattoo removal; and not the relatively painless kind. He's gone for something cheap. We had a guy at our church back when I was a kid with scars like these. He used to be a skinhead, 'til he turned his life around. He'd gotten his racist tattoos removed. The kind of treatment he's gotten would have been extremely painful for him, especially on his face. He's literally taken great pains to get rid of them."

Esposito nodded.  
"Thanks, Lanie."

"You're welcome. Javi, I really am sorry. It's been a long hard week, I'm tired, irritable, I've barely gotten any sleep - "

Javi sighed.  
"I get it. I'm sorry for being weird. I just... I don't want to do this anymore. I 'm ready to be in a real relationship with you. Exclusively."

Lanie gulped.  
"But I'm still not."

Javi sighed again.  
"Yeah. Yeah, I figured," he said, leaving.

"Javi - "

He stopped.  
"We'll talk. I just... I've got some thinking to do."

* * *

The next day, unable to open the door with the entire luggage she had to carry, Alexis knocked. No sooner had Castle opened the door than she found herself enveloped in a bear hug, dropping her bags, a hug Martha soon joined.

"Welcome back, baby girl."

"Oh, Alexis, welcome home!"

"Guys, this is very welcoming, but you're sort of cutting off my circulation."

They broke off, apologising.

Castle stared.

"I missed you so much.

"Me, too."

"It's so great to have you back, Darling!"

"Great to be back."

* * *

"We found your son's blood on your hunting knife," Ryan told Don's father in the interrogation room.

Mr. Hollinger shrugged.  
"That doesn't prove I killed him; it only proves someone killed him with my knife."

"We also have witnesses that place you at the crime scene and you have no alibi."

"Well, there's just one flaw with your little theory: Why would I kill my own son?"

"Because he was going to expose your African American ancestry and you couldn't have that."

"We don't have any niggers in our family. His lies could have ruined us."

"So you slit your own son's throat. All he wanted was to know the truth."

There was a pause.

"I want a lawyer."


	27. Ground-hog Day

**Word Count: 898**

* * *

Tory smiled when she opened the door.

"Javi, hi! Ooh, nice suit. Are we going out?"

"No, we're not," Esposito said. "I am."

Tory stopped smiling.  
"So I guess you've made your decision."

"I have. Lanie and I are going dancing."

"You said she doesn't want the same things as you."

"She doesn't - yet. But it's not fair to lead you on when I'm still hung up on someone else. And if things with Lanie don't work out... it wouldn't hurt me to take some time off from women."

"I hope she realises how lucky she is. You're a good man, Javier Esposito."

"And you... are an amazing woman, Tory Ellis."

* * *

"Hey, Agent Beckett. Welcome home," Castle said as Beckett entered.

She smiled.

"How was your first day as a fed?"

"Ok. It was mostly just my physical and a run-through of my duties."

"Wait, let me get your food first then you can tell me all about it. You are just in time. I've just reheated your dinner. Fortunately I left some aside for you; after six weeks in Costa Rica eating staples Alexis didn't leave any leftovers..." He trailed off when he saw the look on her face. "What's wrong?"

Beckett took a deep breath.

"Castle, I think you should sit down."

He froze, but then did as he was told.

Beckett sat next to him.

"Castle, I meant everything I said yesterday. But at orientation the leader of my new team told me some things."

"What kind of things?"

"As an agent I need to stay out of the spotlight. So we can't have a flashy public engagement. We can't even announce it in the paper because your profile is so high. We'll have to keep things on the down-low for now. Is that ok?"

Castle forced a smile.  
"Of course."

"You sure?"

"Kate, I've had the flashy engagements. I don't need to do that with you. I don't need anyone else to know I have you. You know it. I know it. That's all that matters."

"Really?"

He nodded.  
"Really."

She sighed.  
"Have you heard back yet about you shadowing me at the AG's office?"

"Still no word. But I'm optimistic."

"I wish I could be like that. When I really start working cases, I want to be able to share it with you."

"Well, you're sharing your life with me. Anything else is a bonus."

She squeezed his hand.  
"Thank you. For being so supportive through all of this."

"Hey, I'm your fiancé. That's my job."

* * *

Esposito stood outside her door for five minutes knocking. He tried calling her. He could hear the ringing in the house but there was no answer. He used the spare key he still had.

He smiled when he saw her.

She was all dolled up in a sexy dress, asleep on the couch. Esposito removed his jacket and shut the door behind him before carrying her to the bed and putting her under the covers.

He started to leave but she held on to him.

"Mmm, Javi, come back to bed," she murmured.

Smiling, he sighed and got in beside her.

"Get some sleep," he whispered.

"Mmm."

After a few moments, she started snoring. Chuckling, he rolled her onto her side so she would stop. As a result he was now spooning her, listening to her steady, even breathing.

"I ended things with Tory," he whispered a few minutes later. "It wasn't fair on her to only give her half of what she deserved and... it wasn't fair on me, either. I can't do the splits forever, Lanie. Either we're together, or we're not. No in-between. No dating other people. No meaningless booty calls.  
"As far as I'm concerned, we're together. If I have to wait for you to catch up and figure that out, so be it. You're worth the wait. I wish I could tell you this when you were awake. There's lots of stuff I want to tell you. About how amazing you are, how you make me feel... but you'd probably just freak. I'm not going anywhere, though. I'm in this."

He kissed her shoulder as she slept, oblivious to his words.

* * *

_Six Weeks Later_

"Nervous?" Castle asked as they stood outside their new home.

"Hey, Castle, you said these guys are the best. I just... I'm excited."

He unlocked the door and opened it.

The staircase was the first thing she noticed. It looked like brand new and was much sturdier. Now that the termites were gone and the wall had been rebuilt, it looked a lot better too; and they both had fun turning the lights on and off. She was also very impressed with the work that'd been done on the bathrooms.

"Wow, Castle, this is going to be our home."

"Yep, I've just got to furnish it and we can move in after this week!"

"Uh... yeah."

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Do you not think I'll do a good job?"

"Of course I do. I have complete faith in you."

"Kate, I have excellent taste."

"I know; I just don't want anything too flashy."

"Do you think the loft is too flashy?"

"Well, no, but your study..."

"Ok, every guy needs a man cave."

"What about me?"

"You can have a cave, too."

She snorted.  
"Ok, Castle. You made your point. I trust you."

"I should hope so," he said, smirking.


	28. Our House

**WC: 1,284**

"Oh, my God, Castle!" Beckett said when she entered the bathroom in their hotel suite to find Castle covered in paint removing his clothes. "What the hell happened?"

"I had a slight disagreement with a bucket of paint," Castle said.

"And by disagreement you mean...?"

"I fell off a ladder and it broke my fall."

"You fe - ?! Castle, I thought you were just going to supervise and give instruction!"

"Well, I was but it looked like so much fun and the guys let me use the big roller thing!" Castle said.

Beckett sighed.  
"I like the colour," she said after a pause.

"I knew you would!"

"How's your knee?"

"Fine; it's my back that's the problem."

"Oh, poor baby," she said, helping him take of his clothes before removing her own.

Castle grinned as his eyes raked over her body.

"What, Castle?" Beckett said.

"Just admiring the view," Castle said. "How was work?"

"Same old, same old. Paperwork. I'd die of shock if I actually got to do some field work."

"Please do not joke about dying in the field. I am already in a fragile state."

They stepped into the jacuzzi.

"Come relax with me," Beckett said. "I'll do your back."

"Uh... Kate?"

"Mhmhhm?"

"That - _ohh_ - is not my back," he said.

"You complaining?"

"Hell no!"

* * *

"Is it weird that we're going to New York in order to leave New York?" Castle asked as they boarded the plane.

"We do need our stuff, Castle, and I do not want to live out of a hotel while we wait for it to arrive -plus, you did go to all the trouble of buying that moving truck. I do not know where you are going to keep it."

"There is a place that stores your vehicles for you for a nominal fee and it is not too far from our house."

Beckett smiled.

"_Our house_."

* * *

Beckett and Lanie were sitting at a table in a night club sipping their dinks.

"You know, clubs aren't as fun as I remember them being," Beckett said.

"Maybe this club just isn't very good," Lanie said.

"Or maybe I am getting too old for this," Beckett said.

"Shut your mouth," Lanie said. "You are younger than I am and I can tell you right here, right now, missy, that I, Dr. Lanie Parish, Medical Examiner, am most definitely not too old for this - nor will I be for a very, very, very, very, very long time."

"Oh, Lanie, that is not what I mean," Beckett said. " It is just that... I am not really supposed to drink any more because of my job; it is a rule that I am not yet officially required to adhere to due to the fact that I am not technically on-call until I officially move to Washington; but once I am living there full time in the beautiful new house my fiancé and I have now acquured, there will be no more alcohol for me if I want to keep my job - and I find, to my own surprise, that I do not really mind all that much. I will always be a Manhattan Girl at heart but I _am_ still moving to the suburbs nonetheless and pretty soon I will be a boring, old, married lady - and I have found that I actually like the idea. But you, Lanie, you are still living up the single life."

"Well, not really," Lanie said.

"So, you and Espo have finally called off that ridiculous arrangement?"

"No, but... I may have exaggerated the amount of people I am actually dating."

"Oh, really?" Beckett asked, smirking at Lanie. "Then, tell me, Dr, Parish, Medical Examiner, how many people, exactly, are you actually dating?"

She sighed.  
"Just one: a certain Latino detective with a passion for videogames and the word, "yo."

"Does he know that it's just him?"

"No, he does not. He thinks I am juggling between him and four other guys."

"And, if I may be so bold as to enquire, what on earth possessed you to tell him such a bold-faced lie?" Beckett asked.

"I don't know;" Lanie said, " maybe the fact that if he found out that I only want to be with him, our relationship - or whatever you would call what we have - would get all serious again and I am still not yet ready for that kind of commitment... which is kinda why we broke up in the first place.'

Beckett chuckled.

"What?"

"It seems that the tables have turned, my friend. Now _you _are the one freaking out about a relationship and _I_ am the one giving _you_ advice."

"I do not recall asking you for advice," Lanie said.

"No, but you are going to hear it any way as I am taking a page out of Lanie Parish's Guide to Sticking Your Nose Where it Doesn't Belong."

Lanie groaned.

"Payback is a bitch," Becket said.

"I don't see what is so wrong with what Javi and I are doing."

"What's wrong is that Javi thinks you want him dating other people; so he's doing that even though that's not what either of you really want."

"I didn't force him to sleep with Techno Girl."

"Lanie, it is not fair to punish Espo for doing something you encouraged him to do, especially when he thinks you're doing the exact same thing!"

"Life isn't fair. If he really only wanted to be with me, it wouldn't matter what I did or what I said; he'd just wait for me."

"What, so, this is a test?"

"I am not saying that it is, but hypothetically, if it _was_ a test, he would be failing."

"Lanie, Espo is a very good guy who cares about you. So, why can't you just be honest with him?"

"I should not have to spell it out for him. He should know!"

"He should be a mind-reader?"

"No, but if he was really committed to me he would not want anybody else," Lanie

"How can you expect him to be committed to you when you won't commit to him?"

Lanie paused.  
"Damn, girl; you are good."

"I learnt from the best."

Lanie sighed.  
"I'm sorry, Kate. I didn't come here to fight with you. I'm gonna miss you, girl."

Beckett smiled.  
"I'm gonna miss you, too, Lanie."

* * *

Jim, Martha, Alexis, Lanie and Ryan stood next to the delivery truck outside Castle's loft to see him and Beckett off.

"You're sure you have everything you need?"

"Yes, Sweetheart."

"Everything's double-checked on your list?"

"Triple-checked." He took a deep breath. "Alexis -

"Dad, don't. Please don't say goodbye."

"Ok, I won't, Pumpkin."

They hugged.

Jim looked from the father and daughter embracing back to his own daughter.

"Katie..."

"I know, Dad. Me, too."

They hugged.

"Be safe ok, sweetheart? And if the Attorney General, for some reason or another, just so happens to retire, could you put in a good word for me?"

Beckett sniggered.  
"Seeing as I'll be working _for_ the Attorney General I don't think I'll have that much pull any time soon but I'll see what I can do."

"Why, Jim Beckett, did you just make a joke?" Martha asked.

"Maybe I'm just delirious with grief because your son is taking my only daughter away from me," Jim said.

"More like your daughter is taking my only son from me. _She's_ the one taking the job."

"And - and we're all very happy for her," Castle said.

Martha sniggered.  
"Relax, Darling. We're just playing around."

"Well, stop it;" Castle said, looking from his mother to his future father-in-law, who were grinning at each other, "it's creepy."


	29. Cactus

**WC: 597**

"Funny _and _handsome; those are slammin' genes, KB," Lanie said.

"My lady is aware of her genetic gifts," Castle said. "Just imagine; Beckett genes and Rodgers genes!"

"Grandchildren?" Jim asked.

"We have no current plans," Castle said.

"Yeah, Mr. Beckett, Castle was kidding," Ryan said. "They've moving in and you're picking out colours for a nursery? At least wait until they get engaged."

Jim arched an eyebrow, but off his daughter and her fiancé's looks, let it go.

"Although, it might be nice to give baby Ryan a playmate," Ryan said.

"Oh, Ryan," Castle said, patting him on the back.

"Ow!"

"I'm going to miss you."

"So, we ready to go?" Beckett asked.

"What, right this minute? What about Esposito?"

"Uh..." Beckett said.

"You said you two were cool."

"We are."

"He's avoiding the goodbye. That's so Javi," Lanie said.

"Yeah," Ryan said, reaching into his bag and pulling out a small pot-plant. "But he told me to give you this."

"Oh!" Castle said, taking it. "It's a... cactus."

"A housewarming gift," Ryan said.

"It's... thoughtful," Beckett said.

"Tells Javier thank you," Castle said.

"I will." He paused. "Oh, I'm going to miss you so much, Castle!" Ryan said, going in for a hug.

Castle recoiled.

"Cactus! Cactus! Cactus!"

"Oh. Sorry, bro."

Castle handed the cactus to Beckett.  
"You can - oh, there you go!" Castle said, chuckling as Ryan embraced him, patting him on the back. "That's right. Hug it out. Hug it out. Ok."

Ryan emerged.

"Beckett!"

She passed the cactus to Castle and hugged Ryan as he clung to her.

"I'm going to miss you. It's going to be ok."

"Everything's changing. You're leaving. I'm becoming a Dad. New people are coming to the precinct. Why can't everything just say the same?!"

Beckett looked to Castle.

"That's life, buddy," he said.

"Well, life sucks!" Ryan said, breaking off from Beckett and crossing his arms.

"Hey, Ryan, change can be a good thing. As we speak, your baby is growing into a healthy child. The miracle of life. It's going to be amazing. And whenever you need a babysitter? Washington's a one-hour flight from New York. Consider me on-call."

"You mean it?"

"Hey. You're Castle Junior. I've got your back."

Ryan held back tears.  
"Oh, you guys!"

"Cactus, Ryan!" they both said.

"Sorry."

After saying the rest of their goodbyes, they left.

* * *

"Kate. Wake up, Kate."

Beckett stirred, her eyes and stretching.

"We're home."

She smiled.  
"Home."

"Ok, you ready?" Castle asked as they entered, his hand over her eyes.

"Ready."

He removed it.

"So?"

Beckett's eyes widened.

"Oh, my God, Castle. It's gorgeous!"

"You sound so surprised.

"I guess I assumed you might go big."

But their new home was warm and inviting.

"When we move our stuff in it'll be ours, Kate."

"We can just do the essentials tonight and move on to the rest in the morning."

"Sounds good. Everything should be switched on, so we can have dinner and a shower."

* * *

"I wonder if Mother and Alexis will enjoy their rooms?"

"I'm sure they'll love them. Uh, Castle, this room...?"

She gestured to a room that was the same.

"Uh, yeah, that could be... a spare room."

"Right. Spare."

"And if we did decide to take in that room mate, we could paint it when or if that happens."

Beckett smiled.  
"Wow, everything's starting to get real," she said as he enveloped her with his arms from behind her.

"In a good way or a scary way?"

Beckett grinned.  
"Both," she said , turning to face him. "With you, always both."


	30. I'm Just in Love

**Author's Notes: I don't own Ed Shearan - though that would be nice.**

**Word Count: 505**

* * *

_Lanie looked into Esposito's eyes._

_"Javi, I'm sorry. I've made a huge mess of us. I want all those things you want, I'm just scared." She kissed him, feeling him back away gently. "Please, Javi, help me not to be scared any more. I love you. I don't want an open relationship. I don't want you dating other women and I don't want to date other men. Can we please just start fresh? I want to make us work."_

* * *

Lanie smiled as she woke up in Esposito's arms, breathing in his scent, listening to his breathing.

Her eyes shot open as off went the alarm. The space next to her in the bed was empty.

She could hear water running. It was the shower. She sighed. He was in the shower. She heard it being turned off at the tap. She grinned as she raced towards the bathroom.

Lanie stopped dead when she opened her bathroom door. Because the naked man exiting her shower was not Esposito.

* * *

After his morning work-out and then breakfast, Esposito checked his messages, surprised to find fifteen from Lanie.

"Javi, hi, it's Lanie. So, I said goodbye to Kate today. I'm feeling a bit lonely. I could use someone to talk to, and I know this Beckett thing has been hard on you, too. So, if you're not too busy, you can call me - if you want."

_Beep._

"Hey, Javi, it's Lanie, again. So, I got a little tired of feeling sorry for myself. I'm at the club. You know the one. The place where we used to - Any way, drop by if you want."

_Beep_

"You know what? If you don't want to see me, fine. I don't need you any way. You can go screw yourself, or your techno girlfriend or whoever you've got there with you who must be more interesting than I am. I don't care."

_Beep._

"You want to know the real reason we broke up, Javi? Everything has to be on your schedule. Well, you're not in the military any more, Mr. Sergeant Corporal General! We don't have to talk about everything right away. Maybe I just wasn't ready to talk about marriage. Ever think of that? But no, you had to push the issue, get me to give you a yes or no answer right away! Screw you and the fine ass you rode in on; I don't need you!"

The rest of the messages got increasingly less coherent. Esposito dressed with haste and grabbed his car keys.

* * *

Castle was disoriented when he first woke. This wasn't the loft. No, it wasn't Beckett's apartment either - nor was it the hotel. He blinked as he sat up in bed. It was the DC house; his house; their house. This was where they lived now. This was where their lives were now. He smiled as he walked to the bathroom, surprising his fiancé, who was putting on her face, with a morning kiss before making love to her on their bathroom floor.


	31. When You Wake Me

**WC: 636**

* * *

"Oh, sorry," the mystery man said, donning a towel with haste. "Hope you don't mind."

"Mind? What, that some weirdo is naked in the bathroom? Listen, whatever happened last night - "

"How fuzzy is your memory?"

"Pretty fuzzy," she said.

"There was a lot of drinking going on last night."

"Uh, that part is less fuzzy," Lanie said, holding a hand to her head.

"Look, nothing happened - except for some kissing but being called another man's name is kind of a mood-killer.

"Why did you stay here last night?"

"The bar-tender was uncomfortable sending you home alone. I called a cab. There was less than enough money to go all the way back to my place and walking home intoxicated seemed risky so the couch became home for the night."

Lanie sighed.  
"Well... thank you..."

"Mark - and you're Lanie, I remember."

"Uh... should let you... get dressed."

"Thank you. Oh and Lanie? This Javi guy is a lucky man. Maybe Javi should know what was said last night."

"What was said last night?"

"There was a lot of love shown towards this Javi fellow. There was reluctance to continue seeing other people and regret; apologies. Fear, but resolve to conquer those fears. Or something like that."

* * *

Jenny nudged Ryan awake.

Ryan groaned.

"Kevin, time to get up for work."

There was another groan.  
"Five more minutes."

"Heard that ten minutes ago."

"Call in sick."

"_Is _Detective Ryan sick?"

There was a pause.  
"Damn it, Baby, I can't lie to my wife."

Ryan turned over to press his head against her stomach.  
"Much rather stay here with wife and baby."

"Are you sure this is all about wife and baby or does it perhaps have something to do with saying goodbye to Kate and Rick yesterday?"

"Castle and Beckett left the Twelfth months ago."

"Yeah, but Kate and Rick have been away before. Do you think watching your friends leave made it all too real?"

"It's not like Castle and Beckett are moving to the opposite end of the country; and my friends will still visit."

"Still, it's a pretty big change, and you won't be able to see them as much as you used to. You're not working together any more. That's a difficult adjustment and it's ok to be sad about it. It's ok to miss your friends. Unfortunately, it's not ok to miss work. Maternity leave doesn't pay enough to support all of us. Someone needs to bring home the bacon."

"Can't we go kosher? Then we won't need bacon and I can stay with you here forever."

"That's Judaism."

"Conversion sounds good."

Jenny stroked stroked Ryan's hair.  
"Everything is gonna be alright, baby."

"How's that gonna make a husband want to leave?"

"Kevin."

"OK, ok, getting up," Ryan said, stretching and leaning over to kiss Jenny."I love you both so much."

"We love you, too, now quit stalling and get your ass to work."

* * *

"Ok," Mark said, now fully dressed. "I think I'm ready - ugh."

"You ok?"

"Feeling a little light-headed."

"You should have some breakfast before you leave. I think you have some time before your cab gets here. Have some cereal. "

"Thank you."

"It's the least I can do. Well, not the least. How much did the cab cost?"

"Oh, don't worry about it."

"You said you didn't have money for the cab back."

"Hmm. Guess I didn't think that one through, huh?"

"I can give you a ride back on the way to work."

"Well... if it's not out of your way."

"Where do you live?"

* * *

Esposito was driving towards Lanie's building when he saw her driving out in her car with a man he didn't recognise in the passenger seat. Esposito turned a corner leaving before she had a chance to see him.


	32. Toy Soldier

**WC: 922**

"Welcome to the Lexington Wax Museum; I'm Michelle, I'll be your guide. Now, if this is your first time here, I must warn you: some people find the realism of the sculptures unnerving. Let me assure you, none of them are real. You can take as many pictures as you want but please don't touch the exhibits. So, let's get started, shall we?"

"Jason!" A little boy's mother called after him. "You heard the lady. No touching."

"All I'm doing is looking, Mom!" Jason replied. "Wow!" He said, staring up at a sculpture of a soldier.

"Pretty cool, isn't it?" she said, following his gaze. She kept an eye on her other two children. One was talking to his Grandfather while the third hung on the tour-guide's every word.

"This one looks like those pictures of Grandpa's brother he showed me!"

"That's right; Uncle Max was a soldier, too."

"No, I mean, he looks _exactly_ like him."

"Well, sweetie - " Her smile faded as she looked at the statue with both eyes for the first time.

"Dad?"

"Coming! I hope you're behaving, Jason."

"Dad, doesn't that look like Uncle Max?"

The old man stared.

"Dad?"

"Not just looks like," he said in hushed tones. "That _is _Max. That's how my brother looked the day he disappeared."

* * *

"So, what's the verdict?" Esposito asked as he, Henry and Ryan visited her in the morgue, the soldier lying on the table.

"This is not a wax figure. This is a human being. Embalmed in perfect preservation. We'll have to wait for the DNA results run on a hair follicle sample to confirm if it's your guy, but you've brought the brother in, right?"

"Yeah," Ryan said. "That's the protocol when death is a little more recent for us to be able to make an identification..."

"Man, that's just creepy," Esposito said. "Is this even possible?

"Yeah, bro," Ryan said. "Lenin's body can still be viewed."

"More than possible; it's becoming more and more common," Lanie said. "The subjects are most often not murder victims; it's done with the deceased person's consent. People donate their bodies to museums; for example, in a will bequest."

"That's just weird," Henry said. "I mean, I understand donating your body to science but embalmment? How many lives is that gonna save?"

"Well, having the body so well persevered can be an advantage, right, Doctor Parish?"

"Uh... yes and no., Dretective Esposito. We can't run any toxicology tests, but I can perform an autopsy. If he was just bones, we'd probably bring in a forensic anthropologist to consult."

* * *

To avoid overwhelming Grayson Ryland, who believed himself to be the deceased's brother, Ryan and Henry hung outside in the hall while he and his daughter viewed the body.

"It's human? You're sure?"

"Positive," Doctor Parish said.

"Then that's him," Grayson said. "That's Max."

"You're sure?" Esposito said.

"Here," Grayson said, taking out a picture of his brother. "You can keep that for your investigation."

"Thank you. Seems like a positive id," Esposito said.

Grayson's daughter squeezed his hand.

"This whole time, he was dead. I mean as much as I hated not knowing, I had this image in the back of my mind of him on the run from the army, living some exotic life in secret. But he was already gone. I should have known he wasn't guilty of desertion That wasn't him. But some of the stories you hear about 'Nam... I couldn't be sure he didn't just lose it."

"I'm sorry for your loss, Mr. Ryland."

"I lost my brother a long time ago. It's actually kind of nice to see him again. Even though it's not really him. And I'm glad I finally know what happened to him. I can tell my mother. His fiancé."

"He was engaged?"

"Oh, yeah. Hettie McCree. We've stayed in touch over the years. I'll give you her information. I'm sure she'll take comfort knowing that he didn't walk out on her. I think it's haunted her over the years."

* * *

"Is there anything else?" Esposito asked after they'd left.

"Not at the moment but I'll keep you posted," Lanie said.

"Ok, thank you.

"Javi, wait. I wanted to apologise for the other night - "

"No sweat. Castle and Beckett leaving has been hard for all of us. I'm sorry that I didn't call you back. I didn't hear your messages until this morning. I get pretty tired after a long shift."

"I remember," Lanie said. "Listen, Javi, there's something else I want to talk to you about: Us; where we're going."

"It's ok, Lanie. I don't want you to feel like you have to rush. I think we're both going at a pace we're comfortable at. And I don't want to pressure you - "

"I don't feel pressured."

"Don't you?"

She sighed.  
"Well, maybe a little."

"You don't have to. Enjoy being semi-single for a while. Don't feel like you're tied down to me; don't feel guilty about seeing other guys. I really think this non-exclusive thing is working for us."

"You do?"

"I do. For now. Not forever."

"When do you think it'll stop working for us?"

"I don't know. Like I said, let's not rush this. We made that mistake last time_. I_ made that mistake last time. Let's do it right this time. Take it slow. See what happens. I can be learn to be patient." He winked.

Lanie smiled.  
"Ok."

"I'll see you around, Chica."  
He said, giving her a smile of his own before leaving.


	33. Game Plan

**WC: 1,126  
**

* * *

They used the picture Grayson had given them for their murder-board.

"Private Max Ryland," Esposito explained to Gates. "Missing since June First, nineteen sixty eight. We're still waiting for DNA confirmation."

"Well until you have that, I'm happy for you to proceed under the assumption that this is our guy."

"Thank you, Sir," said Henry.

"You're very welcome. Now, it is getting rather late. Why don't you all go home, get some shut eye?"

She left.

"What was that?" Ryan asked.

"What was what?" Henry replied.

"'Thank you, sir'?"

"What is wrong with that?" Henry asked.

"She was not talking to you," Ryan said.

"I thought she was talking to all of us," Henry said.

"Well, whatever, new guy. Just remember, this is my investigation."

'"Woah, Ryan, bro, what is wrong?" Esposito asked.

"Nothing." He sighed, running his hands through his hair. "Nothing. I have to go home to Jenny."

He left.

"I thought he liked me," Henry said.

"He does like you," Esposito said. "He is just stressed. He said goodbye to Castle and Beckett yesterday and he is going to be a new father soon."

"What was that like?"

"What?"

"Saying goodbye to your friends?"

"Oh, Javier Esposito does not do the goodbye thing. Too messy. This way, the fact that they are gone never hits me and I never have to deal with it."

"That does not sound very healthy."

"Of course it's not healthy. It is extremely _un_healthy. But I am a cop; I do not have time to get emotional every time someone leaves. That is the job; people leave all the time. We were lucky to all have each other as long as we did."

"Ryan is a cop."

"Exactly. Look what just happened."

"Maybe it was just me."

"It was not you. Tell you what, I will take you to The Old Haunt, buy you a beer, maybe shoot some pool with you; what do you say?"

"Really? You and me?"

"Sure, man."

"Cool. I will just - cool."

* * *

Lanie sat in her apartment by herself. After a while, she sighed and made a call.

"Hey, it's Lanie. Look, I was wondering if you could come over to talk. Oh. Well, that is ok. Bring him along. The more the merrier." There was a pause. " Yeah? Great. I will see you then, Toby."

* * *

"Ha!" Esposito said as he sank the white ball . "You just got owned, son! Who is a bitch? Who is a little bitch?"

"Um, Detective Esposito? " Henry said, eying Javier. "Are you ok?"

"What are you talking about?" Esposito asked. Of course I am ok. Hey, can I get another beer up in here?"

"It's just that... you have been kind of aggressive all night," Henry said.

"I am a competitive man," Esposito said. "You have to be aggressive if you want to win - at least, when it comes to pool. If only everything were that simple."

"Does this have something to do with Dr. Parish?" Henry asked.

Esposito raised his eyebrows.

"I hear things," Henry said.

Esposito leaned in closer to Henry.  
"Ok, here's what you have to understand about women. Women are like deer."

"Isn't that a little sexist?" Henry asked.

"Relax, it is a metaphor," Esposito said.

"Actually, it's more of a simile - "

"Will you shut up and let me give you a lesson?"

"Sorry," Henry said.

"Stop talking. With women, you have to be very careful. Calm. Gentle. Any sudden moves and a woman will bolt like a startled fawn. This morning, for example, I go over to Lanie's place to make sure she's ok. I see her leaving with a guy. It's seven in the morning, bear in mind. My first instinct was to pull them over and teach that guy not to mess with another man's woman. Problem is, she is not my woman."

"Right, because women are not objects," Henry said. "They do not belong to anyone but themselves."

"No, because we agreed to see other people," Esposito said. "My objective is to make her my woman again, do you understand? She does not belong with that guy. Or any of the ass-hats she's dating. She belongs with me. But I cannot say that to her. She would punch me in the face. The face if I was lucky. So, I have to give her space. Let her know I'm here, but there is no pressure. Then, when she comes to her senses, I'll be there, waiting to make my move. It is a very delicate process. I admit sometimes it is very difficult not to bend her over that table and show her what's what. But that is not the game plan."

* * *

Toby sat between his friend Lanie and his boyfriend Scott. The three of them discussed her situation over a bottle of wine. Lanie had considerably less than usual.

"Thank you guys, so much. Kate and I usually do this, but..."

"Hey, you are our friend and you are hurting," Toby said, squeezing her hand. "Any time."

"That means a lot." She sighed. "I have been thinking about this for a while. If I keep waiting to be ready, I will never be ready. It is the same thing I used to say to Kate. But then I don't know if Javi's ready... On the one hand, he is being really sweet and understanding and patient. On the other hand... I do not want him to be ok with me seeing other guys. I am not ok with him seeing other girls."

"Lanie -" Scott started.

"I know, I know, if I have a problem with it why am I letting it continue?"

"No, I know exactly why," Toby said. "I know you. You are testing him."

"Which is wrong, I know," Lanie said.

"Who says?" Scott asked.

"Well... Kate?"

"Not to diss your friend but what does she know?" Scott said.

"It is a hard world out there," Toby said.

"If you don't test him how do you know you can trust him?" Scott asked.

"I don't know. But I owe it to him to try. Last night, I had so much to drink I ended up making out with this random man thinking he was Javi; poured my heart out to the poor guy. I'm lucky he was nice enough to escort me home. I had a dream that I said all those things to Javi, he came home with me and we...  
"This morning I woke up and I swear to God I was in his arms and everything was ok. But I wasn't really awake." She sighed again. "I do want to take that leap with him, I just don't want to land flat on my face."


End file.
